Days w/out soda: 45

Days clean: 0 (ate a muffin yesterday) Maybe I should ditch the days clean?

I suppose this goes along with my last post… but when I joined LA Fitness I had the free assessment. The personal trainer (not the one I currently have) asked me what my goals were. I told him to get in shape. Pretty much that is it. So he ask why now? I didn’t want to get into any sort of spiritual stuff so I left that out and just told him I didn’t want to end up like my mom. She can hardly walk but really that is her only health issue. So he kept on me to find out what my goal was, as he said because most people want to look good.

For some reason that isn’t a concern, I figure I’m not going to look good. I’m just going to be smaller and healthy.

So my real reasons for losing weight: First, my health is not in decline, I am very healthy, my heart rate at rest is 60 beats a minute and my blood pressure is usually 130/70. I take no medications… my only issues are my weight and migraines.

Fear of what awaits when I get older also drives me. My grandfather had diabetes, my father had a rare and severe form of asthma that came on when he was 30-40ish. I’m scared… My mom who was always like me, robust, I now watch wither away with age. She always hated “gyms” and exercising associated with them. She was fine with working hard and doing physically demanding things. She was a saddle bronc rider, no stranger to hard work.

I’m 33, in my religion 3 is a “lucky” or “magic” number. I felt that this was a year of change and I needed to make these changes NOW. I have talked to several other people and they all “feel” this is a year of change, it was kind of odd actually. Now I figure I won’t hit my goal ’til next year, but the start was 33.

My piping is good enough to start practicing with my pipe band, which means lots of marching in parades, and I didn’t feel that I could play and march for any distance. My pipes themselves weigh seven lbs, not a big deal till you add having to keep the bag full and breath.

I also live in AZ, and it’s friggen hot! Just about every time I go outside for any length of time I get a migraine. I’ve tried everything, I went to the doctor and got migraine pills and I try to drink lots of water but nothing helps. However, it seems when I am lighter this issue becomes less of a problem.

My long time hero, Cory Everson, she just turned 50 and she hasn’t aged! She is still as beautiful and strong as when I first learned of her, thirteen years ago. If you have never heard of her, she won Ms. Olympia contest six years in a row between 1984 and 1989. I had the privilege of meeting her, and she is a very sweet lady. I want to be as healthy and fit as she is.

Also oddly, I feel very self conscious when I am introduced to my husband’s work associates. I feel I shouldn’t be this big, and that he is some how judged on me. I’m sure that isn’t true, but I don’t feel he deserves me to be big. This is all in my head, he loves me, and has always been supportive, even at my heaviest.

So… now you great anonymous Inter-webs know the absolute truth from me on why I want to get in shape and lose weight.