97 pounds to a better me

I forgot

Posted shawnie81 on October 16th, 2008 | Filed under Uncategorized | Comment now »

My cat also feel threw a screened window the other day while we were sleeping. He is terrified of the outside world. We adopted him from the humane society. He was born a stay and lived outside the first six months of his life. I might also add that he was living outside in winter time. How he stayed alive we don’t know. Anyhoo he hates it when I tie him up outside. He wont even move lol.

So I woke up that day did my normal routine of letting bosco out, getting his treats and bringing halo hers. When I got back in the kitchen I could hear keenan screaming at me.For some reason I decided to look outside and there he was, terrified.I grabbed him up real fast and put him in the house. The poor baby just collapsed onto the kitchen floor. I then ran into our bedroom and started yelling at my husband. I thought he somehow let the cat out. WHen he said he did not I went looking threw the house. I looked at the window in the kitchen and there it was. The screen somehow came out of the metal frame. I am sure he was chasing a bug or something and fell out the window. He was a mess for about two days but is back to himself now.

Did pretty good on food yesterday. Today I am having a pork chop and green beans for lunch. I already made it to try and warm up the house. I just don’t want to turn on the heat yet.It is only 51 outside. Our house is 66 degrees inside. So I turned on the oven to heat it up lol. It works in our small house.

I am going to walk on the treadmill tonight. I made my heart appointment yesterday for novemeber 19th. So I really need to get my crap together so I can get as healthy as I can before then. I want to get off of my meds lol. I had to start taking them again because I got a migraine because my blood pressure was too high. I had way too much salt that day. blah I will stay on them until my appointment and see what he says.

blah

Posted shawnie81 on October 15th, 2008 | Filed under Uncategorized | Comment now »

Wow things are really messed up around here. My eating has been decent for all the stress and drama I have been dealing with. First I have been pretty pissed at my husband. I think we have worked it out. More like I just let it go lol. Then all this stuff going on with my husbands niece. She was in the mental hospital for a week. She just got out today and moved in with her grandma. They have been treating her for bipolar when she is not. I always knew that. She has learned all her behaviors from her bipolar mother. Turns out she has been molested. It really really sucks. They did take her away from her mom. They are treating it as an abuse and neglect case. Her mother did not abuse her and I don’t know if we will ever know who did. She wont talk about it. I do blame her mother. Because of the neglect I believe she was the perfect prey for some sick freak. We just have to be thankful that she is getting the help she needs and is now in a safe environment where she can have a chance at a “normal” life. Then my great uncle just died. He was stubborn and would not wait for help and fell. His brain was bleeding and he was a dnr order so there was little they could do. My grandma is flying back tomorrow.

My exercise has been horrid lol. I really need to get back into my routine. I told my mother-in-law I would help watch K when she needs to get away. It is hard enough to raise your grandchild. I think it is going to be really hard raising a grandchild who needs lots and lots of therapy and attention. She is not allowed to be left alone with anyone.

it has been awhile

Posted shawnie81 on October 12th, 2008 | Filed under Uncategorized | Comment now »

I have not really felt like writing much. A lot of crazy family stuff going on on my husbands side. His sister finally got her child taken away. She(his niece) is in a mental hospital. His just turned nine. She gets out on monday and moves in with my mother-in-law. If my mother-in-law can’t handle her then she will have to go to a foster home. She needs a lot of therapy to undo everything she has been threw. Blah enough about that.

Food has been ok. Nothing really to write home about. Could be better but not bad at all. Still can’t seem to kick the daily nut fix lol. I am lost forty pounds. I am not going to change my name due to the fact that it was not an official weigh in. I need to keep at the treadmill. I did not walk on it yesterday because I was gone until 1030 last night. I took all my little nieces and nephews to the pumpkin patch. Then I went and seen another niece in the play Annie.

tired as always

Posted shawnie81 on October 7th, 2008 | Filed under Uncategorized | 1 Comment »

Went to bed at three thirty am woke up at seven then at nine then at ten then I finally just got out of bed at eleven. My husband had last night off. We played some video games together and I stayed up late. Tomorrow night is the debate. My husband and I love debate night. I am hoping they ask some good questions. I heard it is a town hall style debate and that the audience of independents gets to ask the questions. I am sure they can come up with better ones then they have been asking. It is also about the economy which is AWESOME. I personally have a crap load of questions about the state of our economy.

I keep forgetting to pick up my pills. Blah i have not taken them in months but I still get them filled lol. I don’t feel right when I am on them. They are for my heart yet they make my heart feel weird. All my bp’s have been really good without me taking them so I know i am ok. When I go in december to my heart doctor I am going to ask him about getting off of them. He does not know that I don’t take them. I have never really ever taken them like i am suppose to. At one point I was seventeen and on seven different meds. I just started putting them down the sink. I am the best and worst patient lol. I know the routine but I don’t do as im told.

Food could be better but it is not bad. I walked tonight on the treadmill so that is great. For some odd reason the muscles right above the sides of my hips are sore. Never had that happen before. I was going to start doing sit ups this week but I think I will wait a week and just work hard on walking on the treadmill every night.

B.Small piece of baked chicken

L. egg salad

D. two servings of chili

Snack. Nuts like always lol

yelling at the tv

Posted shawnie81 on October 4th, 2008 | Filed under Uncategorized | Comment now »

that is what my husband is doing right now. He is playing a video game called ShadowRun. He does not enjoy being killed lol. It bothers me sometimes and other times I just laugh at him. I went shopping again today. I really need to stop doing that because it makes my legs sore and I don’t want to walk on the treadmill then. Food has been good. I just need to get back into walking on the treadmill.

I made chili yesterday. It was really good. My husband even ate it. I had it again today for lunch. I am kinda hungry so I might go make some deviled eggs. I might not though. Lets see if I can go today with out peanuts lol. OMG i felt so stupid yesterday. Before I started doing the low cal low fat diet and use to love to drink diet V8 splash. I just assumed that it would be high in carbs because it is made with fruits and veggies. Well yesterday I finally read the label and it only has 3 carbs per serving. I was very happy but felt stupid. I could have been drinking it the whole time. Water get boring after awhile.

my worst pet peeve

Posted shawnie81 on October 3rd, 2008 | Filed under Uncategorized | Comment now »

So I have a few pet peeves. My worst debate pet peeve is not answering the question you are asked. I watch all debates. I have never limited myself to one party. I believe that I owe it to myself and my country to vote for who is best fit to do the job. This really bothered me with Hillary Clinton and with Rudy Giuliani in the early debates. It is disrespectful to not answer the question you are asked. I understand the political point of it. If you don’t know the answer you work your way around it. Ok i have said enough about that. It just really rubs me the wrong way.

My mom moved back home today.She never really left she just went and stayed with my sister.  I think I talked my mom into seeing a therapist. She is going to call tomorrow to make appointment. I guess only time will tell. My parents don’t talk and my mom deals with all the stress of trying to pay the bills. I guess after my mom left the electric co came to shut off theirs because a 68.00 bill was a couple days late. I thought that was funny. 68 dollars are you kidding me. I think it is because in a month they legally can do nothing about you not paying your bill. They have to keep your gas and electric on in WI during winter no matter how much money you owe them.

Food has been good. I did not walk last night or tonight. I might tonight but I don’t think I will. I have been tired and don’t feel like doing it. I think that just keeping on track with my healthy eating habits during all this is a win. I know I am losing inches have no clue when it comes to pounds. No one has said anything to me. Some people asked me how much I have lost but no one has said that they can tell.

My mother-in-law told me tonight that she is going to go on Nutri-system. I don’t even know if i spelled that right. I tried to find a nice way of telling her that her problem is that she lost all her weight before on a system that you could only eat their food. It tough her nothing. She has gained half of the weight back. After she loses the weight she goes right back to eating whatever the hell she wants. I have not eaten a damn thing I am not allowed for two and a half months. Not once have I gone off and ate a bag of chips or a candy bar. This is because I have learned  why i should never eat them. They are a waste of cals and fat. She has learned nothing but that you lose weight when you only eat out of certain boxes.

going home tomorrow

Posted shawnie81 on September 30th, 2008 | Filed under Uncategorized | 1 Comment »

I am going up north to have lunch with my dad to talk to him about my grandma. I think he is the only one who can talk to my grandma and not make her feel that hurt. Then I am taking my three year old niece to the pumpkin patch. Later all my sisters are getting together to talk to my mom. We think she needs to go to therapy to find out what she needs. I have been in therapy for about nine years. It is really helpful to just vent every now and then.

So far today I have eaten a handful of nuts and walked a mile on the treadmill. My husband and I are going out tonight. I will have a turkey burger and some broccoli. Water intake has been good so far today.

not letting it get to me

Posted shawnie81 on September 30th, 2008 | Filed under Uncategorized | Comment now »

So my mom moved out of her house on Saturday. My parents have been married for 32 years. By no means are they getting a divorce. My fathers mother lives with them and is ruining their marriage. She runs the household and my mom is left feeling worthless. My mom lost the sight in one of her eyes do to a blood clot a year ago. Due to that she has not been able to work. So she is stuck in the house with her mother-in-law who always has some little thing to say about everything she does. I am pissed at my grandma. Today when my mom went home to bring back her cell phone so my dad had one my grandma went off on my mom for leaving. It took all three of my sisters to keep me from driving the hour to tell her off. What a bitch. She will not be happy with me when I go there on wednesday and tell my dad how she treated my mother in her own home. I want my grandma out of their house. I know my mom is going to go home but I don’t want her to go back into that situation.

Five years ago my mom almost killed herself. She took a bunch of my pills and her heart stopped. That is why i am so upset with my grandma. She knows my mom is not emotionally strong. All my dad had to do was ask her not to leave but he didn’t. Love does not solve all problems. My mom just wants to feel needed and she doesn’t when my grandma is there.

Food has been fine. I walked a mile tonight on the treadmill.

So I learned nothing

Posted shawnie81 on September 27th, 2008 | Filed under Uncategorized | 2 Comments »

I am kinda disappointed in the debate. I thought that the questions were ok but could have been better. I think one was mean and one was too nice. I don’t think this debate changed anyones mind. If you were for Obama before you are for him now. If you were for McCain you are still for him now. I think debates rarely change anyones mind unless someone really messes up. All we will remember are the sound bites the media will replay until the next debate.

Food was ok today. I need to boil some more eggs tonight. I did not sleep good yesterday. I really hate Chris Mathews. Sorry just thought I would through that in. He is so loud and seems to flip flop around a lot.I will walk on the treadmill tonight when Rachel Maddow is on. I really enjoy her show. It does not come on for another hour. Why is Pat Buchanan always on. He is delusional and louder than Chris lol. I really need to mute the tv. They are starting to bother me. I wish they would just keep Keith on all night lol.

B. handful of peanuts

L. beef fajitas with guacamole

D. cheeseburger with no bun

fall

Posted shawnie81 on September 26th, 2008 | Filed under Uncategorized | 1 Comment »

I finally was able to catch up on some sleep today. I think it was the cooler weather. It will be in the 80’s tomorrow though. Ah i wish summer would just leave already. I love cold weather. Heat is not a friend of mine. It messes with my heart. I will just stay indoors tomorrow with the air on. It is sad to have to still use the air at the end of september in WI. I am excited to watch the debate tomorrow. I am pretty sure they will both show up and hopefully have more than one question about this bailout.I know it is suppose to be about foreign policy but you think they could change it around a bit.

Food was good today. I could have eaten a few less nuts but they are better than a lot of other stuff I could have ate. I walked another mile on the treadmill today. My pulse was 128 before I even started walking much. My pulse is around 100 when I am just sitting. I think I am parking the bike until spring. I need to build my legs up. Hopefully by spring I will be in a lot better shape than I am now.

b. sugar free candy and a handful of nuts lol

L. pulled pork and a pickle and some peanuts(we went out to Texas Road House)

D. two hard boiled eggs