I know it’s been a long time. So much going on, no time to breathe. My Reiki is now official. I have brochures and business cards. YAY! I will head out next week in the afternoons to introduce myself. I have a couple of places locally, that want my business cards/brochures. Actually one of the places may be interested in having me on site.I am just about finished with my yoga training. I completed a final project that was very much enjoyed, I have 2 business classes left and then I teach my class and get certified. I am hoping to get that off the ground by September. I have made a contact with a woman out of NY who is writing a book about body acceptance, and how dieting isnt a good way to gain control over your weight. She has asked me to help edit her book, so I have been busy doing that. She also has linked me to a magazine editor who may be interested in my yoga for plus size women. We’ll see. I should hear something by next week.I have returned back to work 1/2 days- still going to P/T, and doing ok. I have great days, and some not so great.  I had my final visit w/ the cardiologist, and was informed my heart is “perfect”. YAY for me!I have been busy with the kids, now that school is out, and well, that is about it.My weight is up a little, still lower than where I started. STRESS has a way of derailing me, and I just havent had the energy to fight it.  I am much stronger since I started the P/T, and seem to be coming to terms with my a lot of my obstacles. I can let these things affect me negatively or I can make the best of them. It really is my choice. I am feeling very positive, grateful, and looking forward.On a very sad note, I lost a very good friend in a plane accident. He was a pilot, and was alone flying freight, when his plane crashed. I loved him dearly and will miss him very much. I check in with all of you almost daily,  Tony doing amazing, Robyn you too. Way to exercise girl.  Holly always has something to make me smile.  Ruby doing great on WW. Well, thought it was time to update. It sure has been a while. Good luck to all of you weighing in tomorrow. I’ll be by to see.Take care. <3  Sandy 

I was sent this link, and it really opened my eyes. Please take the 20 minutes and watch it.  We can all make a difference. http://www.storyofstuff.com/ 

Has anyone ever wondered what is “really” happening to our world? I mean thought deeply? Our economy is plummeting faster than ever- our paychecks barely cover our basic needs, and it seems to be getting worse. What if this is going in the direction of a depression? I believe we are beyond recession, and depression is coming. There doesnt seem to be as much concern out there as I would have thought.  What are we all doing to prepare for this, if it really does happen?  I’m a true optimist in life, but also I am about reality. I have had to stop myself from thinking and living with the mindset, this is just a phase- I’ll get thru it. I do believe  I will get thru it, but I need to start making some changes now to insure this. I am very grateful to be renting right now. With the economic crunch going on, home owners are potentially in trouble. Foreclosure rates are at an all time high. I can almost understand why people stash their savings under their mattress. If we have to move to make a new life from the current one, have your tools, your money, and you go.  I guess I am over simplifying and possibly over exagerating, but who knows? I’m not too confident that it wont get worse before it gets better-  I guess this just made me think.. beyond my routine every day stuff, and was curious if anyone else has thought about this? Please share comments if you have them. 

Just a quick update- working on my final yoga lesson, and preparing for my teaching class demo.  All is well.  Hoping to be “officially certified” by mid July, and have some classes going by then.  Will keep my “job” as long as I have to, but not any longer.  I have spent most of my life wishing for things to happen, and not getting any closer to my dream. That buck stops here. Once certified, I will be advertising immediately. I’m trying to set realistic goals, but have had a strong feeling now for 4-5 months, that once I begin offering classes, they will come. My classes will be soooo different from mainstream yoga, that curiosity will bring them in, the experience will keep them coming. I have spent this week, making my time away from my “job” all about yoga and my new life after “job”.  My yoga will be an extension of me and my life, and there wont be any bold lines separating the two.  I have never felt so confident in all my life. This experience, along with this blog, have help mold a new woman. I came here, uncertain, and timid, and broken. All who have shared with me, have made a definite impact, and I graciously thank each and every one of you. My weight….. which is why I started this blog to begin with. Well, all I can say, is the less emphasis I put on it, the better I feel. I know I am making some great choices, and will continue to strive to improve my eating habits. My yoga has taught me to love myself as I am today, and that was a hard hurdle to jump. I can say today, even 30-40 lbs more than I’d like to be, I accept myself in every way.  This is not settling- this is separating the weight from who I am. I have worked hard to become the person I am today, and am very proud of my accomplishments. I have learned forgiveness, and acceptance of myself and of others. The anger I was harboring, wasnt healthy to me or anyone around me. I am at a very peaceful place in my life, and am looking forward to each and every day that comes my way. Cherish today-  live in the moment- enjoy your surroundings-  hug your loved ones.  ~Namaste~

Just a quick note to check in. Back to work- getting new claims starting tomorrow. Oh, maybe I hadnt mentioned but I am a claims adjuster- auto. Yup, no more training- throwing me to the wolves. lol.I have 2 weeks left of yoga training, then certification. I have been learning lots of core strengthening exercises at P/T, so I may offer a class for that as well.  I am working on a yoga class now, just have to find out  when I can start teaching. I am soooooo excited. My plus size population is going to love me.   On a serious note, my children’s school had a lock down this afternoon, because there was an armed robbery at a gas station. It was at the other end of town, but still…..  I am in a very rural town- who’da thunk?? I went to our local market after they let me pick up my 14 yr old, and we saw a surveillance helocopter- still not certain if they caught the guy.  Yikes! I just looked it up online. The paper says the suspect was initially involved in a bank robbery then the gas station and they found the vehicle at the elementary school. The suspect is still at large.Our failing economy is only going to continue to bring out the worst in some people. It’s very sad. Gas today, $4.18. It seems to be going up in price daily. What’s going on here? Instead of a Economic Stimulus check, how bout making our every day needs more affordable. Somebody up high is making some serious cash.  OK, dont get me started.Yoga- yes… breathe………. 

ok everyone, I have been trying to fill my days with things I love, or things I have always wanted to do.  Yoga is now an everyday part of my life, and I have wanted to get back into a creative mode. I recently bought a book on soldering. Have always been fascinated, so I went out and bought a soldering gun. A plug in one, not ready for the one with fire- it scares me still. One of the projects I am working on involves silver ware. Sterling- the real stuff. I have been searching locally at thrift shops and salvation army and good will, and coming up empty. I have bid on 3 on ebay, but thats it so far. So my request to any of you who want to join in on my scavenger hunt, is if you go to tag sales, or shop re-sale shops, if you could take a minute and look for silver spoons( any: tea, soup) and knives are good, forks as a last resort. Havent found a use for forks yet, but I have only just begun creating. I would say, no more than $1.00 per piece. If thrift store shopping, you might be ble to find them for 10 cents or so. Any help would be greatly appreciated.  I will reimburse 100%, and will share a little somethin somethin too. Thanks, and I cant wait to hear from you…….. <3  Sandy 

I lost 3 lbs this week. I am thrilled. Now remember, I have been up three, down three over the last month. BUT, very pleased to be down 3 today.  I think the physical therapy has me doing much more than I was doing on my own. The exercises they have given me are to strengthen, so a lot of resistance work, with bands and exercise ball.  I am being diligent to get the exercise in at home, and I guess it’s paying off.  YAY! I know I had taken my measurements a month or so ago. Cant find them. When I do, I will post if I lost any inches. I feel like I gained an inch or two in height, just from correcting my posture. Hope you all have a great weekend. 

OK, so I’ve decided to stop focusing on all the drama, and live my life. It seems if it isnt one thing, it’s another, and thats just life. Roll with it.  So Today,  I had an epiphany….. they come every now and then. Todays was, isnt it sad, that my injury has me, finally, in a healthy state of mind? I think I let the unknown medical crap consume me, along with how I could control my weight before that. I was thinking way too much, and not doing. Tony, you have had such a healthy attitude, just keep on keepin on. I was on, then off. I was questioning every last thing when it came to “dieting” and it got me nowhere. I suffer thru 2 months of hell, not knowing what causes this pain, and in turn stopped my life. NO more.I started physical therapy last Saturday, and have had 3  appointments to date. They dont baby you, they get you moving. From what I understand, with the undiagnosed pain, my body basically folded up( almost fetal position) My posture has gone from bad to worse, and so that is what we are working on at P/T. I do my exercises there, then come home and do them daily in between appts. I have to tell you, I “appear” thinner, just by standing up tall. Crazy, well, not when you think about it. My DH actually commented today, I looked taller. So I have a new exercise ball and bands that offer lots of resistance. I still get the moist heat pads when I first get to my appt, and they are heavenly. I bought vitamins( multi) and extra B complex, and chromium. The chromium is said to help decrease cravings for sugar.  Definitely needed here. I am snacking on raw green veggies, and mainly protein at meals, but not too much emphasis as before. Oh, and I started drinking green tea! THANKS Tony!!!!  I spent too much time thinking about food, and now am trying to just eat reasonable portions.  If we have rice, I have a little. All things in moderation. So, starting tomorrow, I will join in on weigh in’s again. I am not going to post my weight, will post how many lbs lost each week. I dont want to get hung up on the scale too much. I want to take measurements, and see my body firm up, and less about the weight. I have to start somewhere.  It’s a way of life, and getting over stressed about any part of it is crazy. I was crazy before.  So thanks Kanye West for the inspiring song, “Harder, Better, Faster, Stronger”.  Funny it reminds me of the 6 billion dollar man. I’m showing my age! LOL See you all here tomorrow. 

I have FINALLY received my “official” diagnosis. I have a disc herniation- T 7-8.  It is pinching the nerves on the right side of my spine. I’m still waiting for the extensive blood work results( close to a dozen vials of blood drawn) and I am at peace. Mind peace, not yet body peace. I believe I will start P/T soon, as the pain hasnt let up and we are going on 8 weeks. I take that back, the pain has moved around, but little relief. I have an appt w/ my primary doctor on Thursday to talk about returning to work. We may start back with 1/2 days, which would be fine with me. I am entering my 9th week of yoga teacher training, so the end is near. I am really hoping to get out there and teach soon after I’m certified. I have tons of idea’s for plus size women as well as for children.  I have to start calling around to the schools for maybe an after school class or two. and I want to see if any of the halls at the churches may let me use them for classes in turn for donations or a small fee. I am soooo excited to really be so close. Now it’s staying focused and taking steps towards my goals. I want to have my time with my children. Going back to a job I originally left was only out of necessity, not out of love. I am thrilled I have been able to continue pursuing my dream, and am confident I will be living my dream in the very near future. I have 4 weeks left of training, then I have to teach a class as part of the certification. Gosh, I can hardly wait.  To see the vision so clearly, is absolutely amazing. This Friday, I am headed to Bridgeport, to observe, and hopefully participate, in a class taught to elementary school age children.  Then the yoga retreat at the end of the month, to help solidify it all. I couldnt be happier.Thanks to everyone for their kind and heartfelt comments.  They really mean a lot. 

I was contacted yesterday by one of my yoga instructors, who is also a massage therapist. We talked a little about the last 7 weeks of my “medical stuff”, and she must have heard the frustration in my voice. She invited me to her gentle yoga class, and following that,  suggested she give me a massage. Hmmm, I thought. I could make a million excuses out of fear, or I could take back some control over my health and give it a try. Certainly couldnt hurt. So I happily accepted her offer.  Bright and early this morning I took and hour long yoga class. Lots of slow movement, and gentle stretching. Then off for my massage. We must have talked for a couple of hours, before and after the massage. I left feeling empowered. I had never met her, only thru emails, and when she saw me, she asked how much had I weighed, as I had given her the impression I was much heavier. I found this interesting, as I hadnt known I was doing this. I am soo unhappy with my weight, I guess I have made it much bigger than it is. I never had told her my weight in pounds, but must have conveyed myself as a much heavier person.  WOW, talk about negative self image.                                                    I had a lot, I mean A LOT, of tension in my middle( thoracic) part of my back. She said there was a good chance, due to the muscles being so tight, they may have pulled my spine out of alignment. We all know the powers of STRESS. Again, found this extremely interesting, and very plausible.  I dont want to give up my power to heal myself. The medical field has yet to prove to me that their answers are any better. Their treatment takes an additional toll on my body. Makes you really think…….  She ended the session by sharing a few additional stretches I can do to loosen that part of my back up.  I plan to get a massage monthly. I owe it to myself, and I will resume my gentle yoga routine, as it really did help my mental health. I had an awesome day, and a day I would love to fill up weeks with. Today showed me where my life is going. I feel as if I am leading a double life at times, with a “regular job” that doesnt fulfill me, and a lifestyle that has been stuck in a very “normal” routine, with little interest.  I felt alive today, and I want to feel that much more often. As my yoga instructor said, my mind and my dreams are moving a little quicker than my body. All my dreams are coming together, but I need to make sure to give my body a chance to catch up. Next Friday I will be traveling w/ 2 of my yoga instructors to an inner city elementary school where we will introduce yoga to them. Should be quite exciting. Then in just a month, I will head up north( VT ) for my yoga retreat weekend.  Dont let fear stand in the way of your dreams. Believe and they will happen.