From Mushy to Marathon

Oh God - I want to text him and ask what’s wrong - why isn’t he contacting me. But obviously that’s not good, so I want to casually text him and ask how his trip to Scotland was to take his daughter home.

But I should do neither of those things - I should wait for him to make contact, right?

I didn’t think I was in so deep, I was being really careful to stay casual in my head - but I guess I felt more for him than I thought. Why is it that men, when they don’t want to see you any more, instead of actually telling you, they just break off contact - it is so cowardly. I could handle it - if he told me - it’s just the not knowing.

On the good side, I was 146.1 this morning - way below pre-holiday weight. SO close to pre-pregnancy weight - only 1.5 to go!!! In fact, as my boobs are still breastfeeding huge, the rest of my body is actually smaller than it was before as more weight is carried in the boobs - if that makes any sense. Although I managed to fasten some really tight fitted shirts that fitted easily before I got pregnant. I couldn’t fasten them over my boobs last time I tried a few weeks ago. However I look like Jordan in them!! It’s lucky I’m not going back to work - all my tops look WAY too sexy for teachig primary school. Not the tops themselves, they are just normal - just that my boobs make them look sexy.

Stupid Ian - he could have Jordan-esque boobs - all natural at that. I don’t mean HE could have them on HIM - which would be weird - I mean he could have mine!!