There’s no real reason to be depressed today. I haven’t eaten anything bad for me, and I’ve managed 60 mins on the treadmill. My knee isn’t too bad so I might even do the last 30 in a few minutes. Taking the incline off takes away most of the stress so it’s very doable. No, I’m just having a day chasing transcripts (got one student number, waiting for info on the other), and being depressed that I’m broke and unemployed. Also, because I own half this house I won’t qualify for any student aid. The thing is that most student aid is in the form of loans, so increasing the equity loan would likely be cheaper anyways. I just hate the fact that I don’t have that steady source of income. I’m almost to the point where I regret taking the trip (but it’s fleeting because in the end I’m so glad I went). The only truly good thing is that I’m not even tempted to treat that depression with food today. About the only thing I did was choose a meal tonight I count as a comfort food - baked pasta with meat sauce and a little cheese (we keep a frozen blend in the freezer). I did decide to go with 3oz of pasta instead of the 2 that I made last time.

That’s actually kind of sad - that my splurge will be to add 103 calories worth of pasta to my evening meal. I’m laughing as I write this, but it’s kind of sad that my life has come to this. In the end it is much better than making an excuse to go out and coming home with a pint of ice cream. I kind of miss the ice cream, but I don’t trust myself (yet) enough to not eat the whole pint. The next time I’m thinking about it, or maybe in the summer, I’ll look for 4 small containers and divide up the pint when I get it home. Although (just looking online) I might have to settle for sorbet (120) instead of dulce de leche (290). It’s actually not too much of a settle, since in the olden days I’ve bought both. I still don’t want to have to work 480 calories in if I slip thought (god I can’t actually imagine the 4×290=1160). I have a serious question. Is a pint of ice cream something that normal people eat in 4 sessions?

Ack, enough about ice cream and sorbet. I think maybe I will do that last 30 minutes on the treadmill. I actually picked up the weights earlier, but only for about 10 mins. I might do a little more on that front as well.

insubordination - college and university are quite different in Canada. University is usually four years and is a more general education with a declared major. College is usually more area specific, often with work terms (co-op) mixed in, and generally no more than 3 years. College is also (usually) cheaper and not as hard to get into. When I came out of high school (coming up on 23 years ago) I actually got into both, but chose college. I think sometimes that I just did it to piss off my father.  At the time I did computer systems, which I was very good at, but didn’t find it was what I wanted to do for the rest of my life. My father always wanted me to be an engineer (which he was) and I often think if he hadn’t pushed so hard, I might have eventually done. That’s a long way to go to answer your question, but it will be either mechanical engineering, industrial engineering, or manufacturing engineering (all with a ‘technology’ slapped on the end). If I were insane enough to want to, I could probably turn it into a university degree by adding a year or so of study at the end of it. When it comes time, if it can be done at night, I probably am insane enough to try.

It wasn’t me who asked about the pictures, but I did go look. I wish I looked like you 20 years ago (although I had the attitude down completely).