Mind...Body...Spirit

A quiet victory…

ravengirl — Fri, 21 Nov 2008 17:33:07 +0000

I had a quiet victory yesterday… I had a plan derailment yesterday… I went to pilates… I got stuck in traffic so I didn’t get to hit the crossramp before class…grrr… Anyway, I had to then go pick up my glasses, pay the cable bill, and ended up having lunch with DH. (Best part of it all!!) Unfortunately the Subway woman didn’t give me hardly any meat in my sandwich! I had soup with it but I knew my protein was sorely lacking… And I knew it wouldn’t bode well for how I felt the rest of the day…and it didn’t…by the time we were on our way home I was feeling cranky and negative and irritated… I knew I was crashing so when I got home I grabbed some cottage cheese and almonds…and my Ipod… I filled the physical need and soothed the mental with music that I love… After I took care of that, I showered and rested…and felt better… I am healing!!! I am on my way to Radiance!!! I am sooo happy with myself right now that you can’t even imagine!!!

Ooh!!! Who fell off the chair laughing at Survivor last night??? HA!!! ROFL!!!! Buh Bye Randy!!! Bon Voyage!!!

Yoga is the best…

ravengirl — Wed, 19 Nov 2008 22:51:18 +0000

thing that has EVER happened to my arms! Seriously! I have done Tae Bo…was crazy about it… I have done weights…not so crazy about them…turns out…Down Dog is what I needed all along! I had been slacking a little on going to the Y for my classes…not so much because I didn’t want to do the classes…but because of the drive there and back…with road construction and just the regular driving around here sometimes it makes me just want to stay home! So, I had been using my foot as an excuse to stay home and dork around. I started back to classes last week…and I have done well this week as well…Typically I aim for Pilates on Tu, Th, and Yoga on Wed and Sun. Today I went a little early and did 30 mins on the Crossramp before class. It was difficult…thankfully the Instructor was on the Treadmill and she took a couple extra minutes to cool down before we started class. My muscles were warm and I was just really in the groove today. Which brings me to my tale of VICTORY!!! Yay me!!! Oh yeah, I better tell you what I did, huh?? lol

My balance was really strong today! Better than it has ever been!! I went into Tree and our hands went from prayer to overhead and back down…amazing enough right? (Say yes anyway!) Then she said to try closing our eyes!!! I did it!!! It felt amazing!!! And then I kind of wobbled on the next pose so that sucked some of my thunder but I am just ignoring that!!! It felt fabulous!!! I feel amazing…

I have noticed everybody putting up there food intake…I was doing that for awhile wasn’t I? Well, I guess I will try it again too… Since starting RR I pretty much only eat three meals/day and my baked potato 3 hours after dinner before bed. (For serotonin purposes, not diet)

5:30 Shake made with no sugar added Soy protein, 1 cup unsweetened soymilk, 1/2 banana, 3 tbsp of oatmeal and 1 cup of ice

11:30 1/2 sandwich on wt with, smoked turkey, honey ham, tomato, lettuce, avocado, and dijon mustard, with small carton of vitamin d milk (I got caught running errands and had to stop and eat at a supermarket, I wasn’t terribly hungry but part of my program is regularly timed meals. When I got home about 12:30 I also had 3/4 cup of lowfat cottage cheese with about 8 Cocoa roast almonds tossed in…and a Dove dark ice cream bite…(My one indulgence lately…and worth it at 60 cals…if it triggers me I will have to stop but so far so good)

I will update dinner when I get to it if I have the time…I have to go do some reading…after my shower that is! Ewwww….

Doing pretty good…

ravengirl — Wed, 19 Nov 2008 04:00:03 +0000

Foodwise at least…my exercise is suffering a little right now… I went to Pilates this morning which is good but not the cardio that I need so much… I need it all really…Yoga…Pilates…Meditation…Cardio…all for different reasons but all important ones. Cravings have settled into the background…oh man…it is so nice when they aren’t driving me crazy!!! It feels so peaceful when I don’t feel like eating everything that isn’t nailed down!!!

Biggest Loser day! Man…I hope Vicky goes tonight…please let her evil presence be gone!!! Nothing much else to share…I caught up with some old friends today on the phone…talked to the parental units…it means I am feeling good and not isolating…always a good sign!

Love catching up on all your lovely blogs Chickies!!! You are all doing fabulous!!!

Ahhh yesss….

ravengirl — Sat, 15 Nov 2008 20:50:40 +0000

It is a beautiful morning! I woke up last night to the sound of pounding rain…I love that…and this morning everything just smells so green and fresh and clean. I had some trouble falling back asleep after the rain so I slept a little later than usual this morning…didn’t care…felt so good! I got up, had breakfast, lovely coffee, made breakfast for my gorgeous DH…and worked out on the elliptical for 45 mins… I feel awesome…I am just taking a quick water break and then I am going to do some core work…take my shower…meditate…have lunch and take DD to Madagascar 2…yeah sounds like a good plan…. I am also taking her to the Twilight party at the local Borders tonight…she is a Twilight freak like all the other teenagers in the world…go figure… :)

My headache is gone…it hung on most of yesterday keeping me from getting a whole lot accomplished but it has finally left the building!!! Hey Melly! Wanna come over!!! :) I would love to get more massages!!! I actually thought about pursuing that line of work myself… But I guess after doing it all day you don’t much feel like doing more work huh? :) It could have been toxins I have no idea… I did have something like that happen to me at night while I was sleeping though…I woke up with my sinuses completely clogged and then when I shifted position it went away but left me with a bad headache…I have never had it happen on the massage table though…it was really weird..

Oooh!!! Who is hating on Vicky on Biggest Loser???? Who is with me in just wanting to choke her through the tv!!! Okay…not very Yoga…must release that negativity…but Damn!!! That girl reeeaallyy bothers me!!!

Head Hurts…

ravengirl — Fri, 14 Nov 2008 19:55:46 +0000

DD got a spa treatment for her birthday present from her Grandma yesterday… And I couldn’t let all that time waiting for her go to waste could I? :) I got a massage and reflexology session… It was a deep tissue massage… Now I have gotten them before…before I started doing yoga and pilates as well…I used to have a lot more pain during them and I was very sore afterwards… Well, I do have a fair amount of discomfort when they work certain muscles…but yoga teaches you to breathe into things that aren’t necessarily comfortable. Also, I think the stretching of my muscles really helps them to release under pressure. I was truly enjoying myself…aaahhhh… Then about halfway through the session or so my sinuses clogged badly while I was laying face down on the table…I could feel the pressure and couldn’t breathe through my nose at all…it was very strange…then when I flipped over for that part of the massage it eased…and when I got up and moved around it totally went away and then I got a bad headache with nausea… I am still fighting with it…ugh.. Now I don’t know if it was from the sinus pressure or now a weather change…it is raining today and the weather is very muggy… Not sure…but the rest of my body feels great!!! Does that count?!!! :) I am also a little tired…I have had a couple nights of less than usual sleep…that could make me tired as well…

My eating has went well…I didn’t eat my emotions the day before yesterday…yesterday was on plan…I didn’t touch anything that would harm me…even though my schedule was disrupted which is a big step forward. Progress is a wonderful thing…

I also figured out that my medication (that I have since discontinued) did indeed lower my metabolism and I have proof! I have worked out on my elliptical for several years…I have also used a heartrate monitor and recorded the evidence. The other night I noticed the evidence staring me in the face! I heartrate at the pace and level of resistance was at least 8 beats per minute low!!! If it is doing that when I am working out can you imagine what it is doing while I am sitting on the couch!!! I am crossing my fingers at this point that my body will recover and if not…well…at least I know that it is nothing that I am doing wrong and I can give myself permission to be good with doing the best that I can with what I have…always a good thing…

Managed to not eat my emotions…

ravengirl — Thu, 13 Nov 2008 03:43:19 +0000

So, having a day…frustrated…irritated…tired…all of the above… I am feeling better as I type this but it was definitely touch and go for most of the day. Normally, before RR and my development of better habits I would have fallen into anything and everything in the cupboard or refrigerator… I didn’t…and I count that as huge steps in the right direction. I drank licorice tea…I sat in the a/c and drank licorice tea and tasted every nuance of the flavor and focused on my breath as I did it…and I didn’t eat between meals… I also didn’t work out…didn’t do much of anything else of any use to anyone today but I didn’t eat my feelings…Progress…definitely progress….

Weebles Wobble but they don’t fall down…

ravengirl — Tue, 11 Nov 2008 19:09:56 +0000

:) Yeah, I don’t know if anyone reading this (is there anyone reading this?) will get the reference but it is a pretty old tv commercial… I have been wobbling on my program lately… I think I figured out where the wobble started and I am working to fix it. I think it started with Atkins bars… I checked the label and the sugar/sugar alcohol content was fabulous (as in almost non existent) and the carb count wasn’t high enough to become alarming buuuut….my reaction to them seems to have been less than favorable…my journal writing wobbled…my eating in between meals crept in…and I have been over eating and my cravings for all sorts of insane foods have been INTENSE!! In fact, I found myself with doughnuts staring me in the face a couple days ago… I am happy to say that they did not win…but I also have to say that the reason that they didn’t win is mostly the thought of telling DH that I ate the doughnut and the ensuing sugar madness… The look of worry and disappointment on his face…I could see it…and that is what really gave me the strength to walk away… I have not had a serious craving for a doughnut since I began RR. I believe that I have pinpointed the problem however and am running back towards the path. Yesterday was good…in so many ways… And I am feeling good this morning as well. It was also funny that Friday was the day I had the in your face meeting with the doughnut… I had just walked out of the store and DH called… I was still feeling frustrated and squirmy and bitchy…and then I got home and checked the mail…my bodhi seed bracelet that I had ordered from Shakya Design had arrived…even though I had only ordered in like 3 days prior… It is basically for meditation without drawing attention to it. Sometimes they call it Focus jewelry…I like that…I really do. And for several nights before the bracelet came I had slept really poorly and awoke with nightmares…they have stopped since I began wearing it… Could be coincidence…maybe not…but they do mention on the website that they can help with nightmares…seems kind of odd… Have you ever seen bodhi seed? It is very smooth and beautiful..but flawed as well…and the scent is earthy and rich and soothing…my bracelet has a carved bone endless knot in the center and that is how I like to envision my life with DH…entwined and endless…

Today is a new day…and it is beautiful…and right now…I am firmly on the path…no wasted thought of the days spent wandering alone in the dark…I am on the path…I can see the light ahead and I am moving toward it…

Halloween…no candy…and still fabulous!!!!

ravengirl — Sun, 02 Nov 2008 17:41:19 +0000

Okay, so, DD & I just had the best Halloween ever!!! We just arrived home from the Haunted Plantation…and it was FABULOUS!!! We had heard that the line gets really ugly really fast so we had a steak plate for dinner and was out of the house a little after 5. When we get to the parking lot we park and aren’t really sure where the line is going to be so we just wait in the SUV for awhile. We have this little local boy come up and try to scam us with some bogus offer for tickets…(did he really think we were stupid????) Then he asked us if we were from around here and when he found out we were he moved off… :) We wait for awhile and finally do see a line starting to form…so we go get in line…we thought they were going to open at 7…well…they did start selling tickets about that time… You actually have to stand in line twice…once to get a ticket…and then to actually go in… So we follow the rest of the crowd to where the entrance tunnel is and begin to wait…and wait…and wait some more… Our feet and back are starting to hurt…people are whining…and milling about.. It has been dark for quite awhile by that point, at first the sky was clear, you could see the stars…then it started to cloud up and for about a minute I thought it might actually rain…how creepy would that be???? I was having a good time anyway, people watching, and enjoying the silhouettes of the trees against the night sky. Finally the lady (we called her the Line Nazi,hehehe Seinfeld…get it??? with the flashlight started yelling that it would only be about another minute and that we all needed to be in line and on the sidewalk! They probably should have listened because about then they released the actors out of the tunnel and they all came moving down the line…yeah…the guys with chainsaws made them get onto the sidewalks real quick!!! :) DD & I were already on the sidewalk but she still didn’t escape…one of them on the way back decided that she looked like an easy mark and while we both saw him he looked like he was going right by…until he wasn’t…and instead spun around quickly and ended up in her face with his chainsaw! Yeah, we weren’t so bored or tired anymore!!! That will wake you right up!!!

We did have to wait a little longer to go in…we ended up in the tail end of a small group…boy that sucked…they have so much more to work with when they can cut you off from the group!!! Anyway, DD and I were linked as we were going through the tunnel and the “lovely” witch? ghost? whatever she was, came creeping down beside us… That is when the fun really started…through the chainlink fence after we heard the rules… that is when the actors really did have free rein to mess with us… A wooden walkway…and all the monsters you could handle… My own personal favorite…Michael Myers was there…and decidedly attracted to us…(I shouldn’t, in retrospect, have worn my Michael Myers Halloween tshirt…probably a poor idea) They were surrounding us…driving us off the pathways and into more of them…poor DD had the creepy clown shadowing her (she loathes clowns…)…and Michael followed us for so long I seriously considered breaking the rules and running…as it was I just muttered “please go away…over and over again” under my breath while getting as close to the couple in front of us as possible without creeping them out! Now, she will tell you that I edged ahead of her and left her beside Michael…ummm…could be…all is fair and I had to get away!!!!!! Ask her about seeing the creepy old lady sneaking up on me and not saying anything!!! Yeah, sweet girl isn’t she!!! Add in the creepy lullaby music…some flashing lights and fog…and ending with the TWO leather face dudes (Texas Chainsaw Massacre) with chainsaws on the way across the field… Yeah…one of them may have gotten a yip out of me…not a scream mind you…but she is still proud that as she says “she didn’t make *any* sounds…and has to lord it over me… It was hands down the best time we have ever had. We stopped and got tshirts to support the actors…definitely wanted them to come back again next year!!! Oh yeah…and the tshirt guy told me I was very in shape…:) I was thinking, “Dude, I am already buying the tshirt, you don’t have to sell me any more…” hehehe I was trying to decide what size I wanted…I ended up with a SMALL!!! Can you believe it??? (Mens Tees but still!!!) It is a little tight across the tatas though!! :P It was so crowded when we left that people were parking along the road out of the actual plantation and the whole place was a mob scene…definitely worth the early arrival time…

A wonderful Halloween…and not one piece of candy…Yay me!!!

Been awhile…

ravengirl — Sat, 01 Nov 2008 00:20:30 +0000

So, it has been awhile since I have sat down here to visit…with you…with myself… I have been dealing with some bumps in the road… I have become a little reserved with the other forum that I post on…RR… and it has lead to some bumps and wobbles of my faith in the program… I am coming out the other side of that… I still believe the forum is too controlled for my taste but I am learning that I can separate my belief in the program from my support of the forum… Thankfully this forum is everything that I could hope for except for not having a special place for us Sugar Sensitives! :) Ah well…can’t have everything! (I keep telling myself that! I have been struggling with my program a bit…nothing extreme…just some bad PMS feelings…a migraine…and my plantar fasciitis flaring up… I have had to curtail my walks with the pooch this past week…I went to the dr. and he gave me some new stretches and at home treatments… I have also not been doing my classes at the Y this week either…lots of downtime…hopefully next week I can get back to work! My weight is jumping around again…sigh..165 this morning…damn am I tired of that number! I didn’t buy Halloween candy until today…I am hoping that we give out a lot tonight… (well, DH is giving out the candy) the rest will go to school with DD and for her own use… :) I am really excited about tonight though, DD & I have plans to go to a Haunted Plantation tonight! It will be our first actual “Halloween activity” We usually sit and watch movies and give out candy…in our past homes it has always been to cold to go out…and we didn’t know about any real activities… This year is different and I am thrilled…it has gotten really good reviews and is supposed to scare the hell out of you!!! :P Oh! And tomorrow I am taking her to the carnival!! Yay!!! Lots of awesomeness!!! lol So! Busy busy…and Happy Halloween everybody!!!

Peace…

ravengirl — Tue, 14 Oct 2008 23:12:22 +0000

Peace in my head, my heart, my body, my spirit. The four days of dogwalking have turned into more… I talked to our neighbors about the walking…and they didn’t mind! I find that concept alien to me…if I had that beautiful girl no one would walk her but me unless it was a bonafide emergency… I don’t understand people that can own such a beautiful animal and not give it the exercise that it needs. I guess maybe that is because exercise blisses me out…dogs bliss me out…exercising with a dog is almost too much bliss to handle!!! :) I am eternally grateful that they don’t share my views though and maybe, just maybe someone is looking out for me in this!

Add a kickin’ playlist and a cool overcast morning and I am feeling in heaven! I had everything ready to go and out the door by 7 this morning…we were back by a hair after 8 and then I left for pilates. Traffic was heavy as always so it was touch and go about whether I would make it to class…I was lucky and the class before it was running late so I didn’t have to interrupt anyone… It was a good class, the small fuji apple and string cheese tasted so perfect… And when I got home I ran into L (dog’s owner) I expressed my gratitude again and we actually set up a date to walk D (the dog) together on Thursday…it won’t be the pace we are used to or the time length but I feel like it is very important to have this bonding…I feel good if I can inspire anyone to get out and move and maybe when I am no longer able she will keep it up and D will have the owner she deserves.. I am very excited about this and I hope she doesnt’ cancel…

Food is going incredibly well since my last meltdown…smile…isn’t that always how it goes…but I do have to say this time feels different…maybe the winds truly have shifted for good. Only time will tell… And, I have my plans for my next visit to see my parents which puts such a bounce in my Dad’s voice whenever we talk… He has been through a lot and I am the Baby…and that goes a long way… :)

All that being said…DH has a official diagnosis of remission…I am getting my doggie fix and some excellent exercise…my food is on track and steady…I feel wonderful… My meditation is going well, and consistently and I feel peace flowing through my body today from head to toe…that is the only way to describe it…and it feels wonderful…