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B: 1 yogurt

2 fruits (canNOT remember what they were…)

2 eggs

L: 1 veggie sausage

1 corn on the cob

2 tomatoes

D: 1 grilled cheese sandwich

S: frozen mango, two plums…

1 pepperoni stick (WTF?)

6 vodka and fruit juices

1 49 g pack peanut m & m’s

- The John Janzen Nature Centre and Fort Edmonton Park today!

- A drink and girl talk with Leah tomorrow

- Kickboxing on Tuesday!

- Blindness (the movie lol) on Wednesday.

- Hair style and color on Thursday!! (My first reward! One day late, because we’ll be busy Wednesday night)

- 10 days away from my pearls! (Second reward for remaining binge-free and eating well)

- 17 days away from weekend trip! (Third reward)

- 24 days away from Victoria’s Secret dress (Fourth reward )

- 92 days from New Years’ getaway with my honey!!

Also…

I’m feeling and looking much less bloated, both in my stomach and my face.

Every day OP brings me closer and closer to fitting into all the clothes in my closet that is just begging to be worn

I had a funny thought this morning about the frustration of wanting to lose it all immediatly. I had a picture in my mind of a balloon deflating, followed by the thought, “I’m not a balloon, I’m a human!” Guess that sums it up

I’m back on track today. Not hungry for breakfast, but for lunch, having a salad with mixed beans and ranch dressing. I don’t know what I’ll do for dinner.

I’m giving myself a one month challenge. Do without extra sugar, milk, and all empty calories and alcohol (also goes without saying, no bingeing). I garuntee I’ll feel a hundred percent better, and it will kick start my weight loss.

My rewards are going to be as follows:

One week = hair style. I’m getting it cut shorter, and colored blonde with highlights and lowlights. Can’t wait!

Two weeks = pearls. There are this beautiful pair of pearl earrings that I can totally afford. The necklace might have to wait

Three weeks = weekend trip. I want to go visit my sister and my neice and nephew. Miss them so much!

Four weeks = A dress from Victoria’s Secret. I’ve been wanting it and putting it off for SO long. I’m going to do it!

I figured out that with spending an average $20 a week on binge food and buying one two six of alcohol, I would be spending $130 a month on junk alone. That right there will pay for my dress!

Off to work! Here’s to a great, OP day

1 oatmeal to go bar

1 pear

1 apple

1 orange

1 cup brown rice and one vegetarian chicken breast

half a corn cob

1 salad, with something

1 alcoholic drink (probably vodka and diet coke)

1 plum

1 pear

1 apple

1 orange

1 small greek salad (OMG salt!!)

1 small chocolate milk

1 Subway salad with seafood and sweet onion dressing (OMG sugar!)

1 small Second Cup chillatte (too much milk )

Tomorrow…no dairy products. My stomach needs time to heal from today

1 pear

1 oatmeal to go bar

1/2 subway salad with grated cheese, olives and sweet onion sauce (I’m just listing the protein and dressing here)

1/2 medium light lemonade

1 pear

2 carrots

Rest of the day:

Other half of the salad with chickpeas added for protein

1 yogurt cup

1 plum

1 small donut

1 Timmy’s apple cinnamon tea with 1 honey

1 apple

1 pear

1 oatmeal to go bar

1 apple

1 plum

1 apple

1 mug black coffee

For the rest of the day:

Salad with chickpeas and ranch dressing

1 pear

2 boiled eggs

2 carrots

In order to really feel and act my age - not 20 years older.

To look fantastic in a bikini…or naked…in my jacuzzi on New Years

To deal with this depression.

To be able to deal with life.

To really be able to nurture relationships in my life.

To fit into my clothes.

To help my back and my feet.

To dress professionally at work.

To look great in a dress at Christmas

To be brave enough to go out on Friday nights with the girls.

To get rid of the bloating and upset stomach.

So that I can really sleep at night, and wake up refreshed.

To help me to feel sexy again.

I pledge to come here and look at these reasons whenever I am tempted.

To improve my quality of life (a sense of wellbeing).

In order to really live life, not just exist.

Food for today: before walk - one cottage cheese fruit cup. After walk - two hard boiled eggs and a peach. Lunch - Brown rice with one italian Tofurkey sausage, marinara sauce and brussel sprouts. Dinner - Salad with iceberg lettuce, beans, tomatoes, cucumber, and maybe a few other veggies, with a bit of ranch dressing. I’m going to make a trip to the farmer’s market shortly, and then clean up my kitchen/house.

I’ve been eating better and treating myself right for almost a week now, I think. I frequently get frustrated with how I’m popping out of my clothes, but I know that this didn’t just appear overnight. It’s going to take time to go away.