Well, I’ll tell you what’s going on. FAT part of my brain is overriding SKINNY part of my brain, but I think I have it under control, because I’ve given myself permission to cheat BUT VERY LITTLE and on this diet, it monkeys with delicate balance over my metabolism and water retention.
Exhibit A (Saturday): One beer on friend’s bachelorette night.
Exhibit B (Tuesday): This sounds dumb, but “as garden club president,” I had to get the refreshment portion of the meeting under way, because we were all busy admiring member hostess M’s FANTASTIC house (her husband made a pile as a geologist in Saudi Arabia decades ago, and they’re still living off of it. She’s decorated her house in an incredible, Middle Eastern way, and paints, collects minerals that are lying around the house, and she’s cultivated an incredible bird population). Anyway, I took one of the pre-caked plates (there were no empty ones), grabbed a fruit skewer and walked into the room where everyone was standing around talking– See? Time to eat, let’s move it, yes?– and while everyone was descending on the buffet, I messed up the cake so it looked like I picked at it, but I took one bite to reduce the size of the cake matter on my plate. Yeah, it was really good, but one bite was enough. I put the paper napkin on top, so no one would notice how much I wasted. Which is also dumb– why should I care what anyone thought? Not my fault someone gave me too big a slice.
Exhibit C1 (Wednesday, yesterday): Since garden club happened on the night of our wedding anniversary, H and I went out last night to a Mexican restaurant which serves this fantastic shrimp soup (avocado bits, rice, tomato, lime juice, onion, garlic, fresh jalapeno). The salty broth and avocado were enough to sink me on this otherwise-healthier menu choice, but THEN…
Exhibit C2 (Wed.): I also had about 15 tortilla chips and salsa. Salt, corn, oil– 3 baddies in 1. Enjoyed it, though.
Exhibit C3 (Wed.): I ate carrots when we saw Iron Man (good flick). I’m not sure if this is evidence of cheating– I think on this diet, I can eat veggies, but I’m pretty sure I’m only supposed to have them during one of my six meal times, and it was too soon after dinner. Hrm.
HOWEVER, in my defense:
Mitigating factor 1: These are all holidays, events, celebrations. Even though the diet says that’s no excuse, well– I’m not an automaton. And while others’ feelings aren’t paramount to my own health and thinness, I think I can make some conciliatory gestures, like eating ONE bit of cake or having ONE beer to everyone else’s SIX. It’s called “participation.” But I will have to remain vigilant when I do participate. Kind of like drinking.
Mitigating factor 2: I’ve restrained myself VERY well, and I’ve realized I can enjoy myself without relying on food. Every “eating” celebration, I have to tell myself, is an opportunity to reinforce my learning that “food” does NOT equal “fun.” Especially when I wind up wearing the “fun” on my ass, hips, arms, gut, and chin. Praise the lord and pass the Nutrasweetened-grapefruit slices.
Mitigating factor 3: Weight fluctuates. Weight fluctuates. Weight fluctuates…
I did ride my bike yesterday. Made good time, under an hour for 12.5 miles, avg. speed 11.5 mph. I need to start adding the spurs, the offshoots of the trail. Was a great ride, saw a turkey, a deer, almost ran over a baby snake, and a bird tried racing with me which was cool. The bergamot is lovely, and the spiderworts are incredible. The wild grapes should be abundant this year.
Upcoming pitfalls (ahem, opportunities for using my new healthy habits): Oy vay, where to begin? A) Tonight’s rehearsal dinner, B) tomorrow’s the wedding, C) Saturday is graduation celebration with the Fat Family (ILs), and D) as a reward and a respite, H offered to leave his SIL’s early Sunday a.m. so we could eat breakfast out. I’m going to take him up on it.
Pitfalls avoided: A) I could’ve eaten SO much at garden club. Brie en croute, chocolate, and I don’t even know WHAT else, I honed in hard on the fruit skewers. B) A WHOLE MENU full of Mexican fat-food. Cheese, flour, oil, corn- the regular staples, and I avoided the worst that was offered. C) Oh, the smell of the movie popcorn was tempting. Thank god we ate beforehand, and I had carrots with me. I need to get in the habit of attending movies WITHOUT snacks, though.
Let’s walk before we run, shall we?
More later on today…
Posted on May 22nd, 2008 by nike
Filed under: General
Leave a Reply