Well the “No Cheese” thing worked…
… at least so far!
I’m down 1.8 lbs today, down to my lowest weight since having Z: 198.2! 
I know I still have quite a ways to go, but I’m still very happy.
I’m also more encouraged about the whole Jillian Michaels thing. I’ve never really stuck with an exercise program (outside of the treadmill), so I’m pretty proud of myself that I’ve kept this up, even short term. I’m also starting to feel like it might be making a difference. I just measured myself today and I’ve lost 6 inches from my waist and 4 inches from my hips :) Like I said, I know I still have quite a ways to go, but it’s a good solid start 
I hope we can get our air conditioner fixed soon. Yikes it’s hot in here today! I might skip the aerobics and just do the strength training if it doesn’t cool down in here some.
Posted by mum2monkeys on July 30th, 2008 under General | 1 Comment »No Cheese, Jillian Michaels, and All Sorts of Emotional Turmoil
Well, let’s start with the no cheese.
Last week, I gained several pounds, and ended up back at 200.4 (blech).. Then I kind of hovered there for several days. So I decided to try something different. Even though I’d been staying faithful to SB, I realized I was overindulging in higher-calorie foods, namely, cheese. So yesterday I decided to go Cheese-Free until my birthday (which is Thursday btw!) It’s harder than I thought — I forgot I don’t just eat cheddar, monterey jack, and mozzarella.. No, I eat those and parmesan, ricotta, and Laughing Cow Light. Oh, how I miss my Laughing Cow Light *sigh*
But, it seems to have worked, at least temporarily I’m down 0.4, and back at 200 even (dangit, couldn’t I have just been 199.9?? Sheesh!)
And then on to Jillian Michaels.
I hate this woman.
Okay, no really, she’s great, but she’s TOTALLY kicking my butt! I’m on Day 2 of the 30 Day Shred (and I admit, I did take yesterday off… What?! My knees hurt!) I can totally feel it working, even though I still feel like I’m going to die. I’ll admit though, I think I might have to switch to a workout with less impact because my knees are killing me (I have bad knees anyway). My arms already feel stronger though, and I’m hoping by the end of August, I’ll be able to see a big difference in the way they look
And finally, the emotional turmoil.
When my youngest son was just a few days old, he started having seizures and went through hell with the hospital and the PICU before he got better (read his story at http://meetoursprout.blogspot.com/2008/04/sprout-is-in-hospital.html — just click on “Newer Post” to advance through his story)…
He’s fine now (yea!!)
Thing is, I never really let myself cry about it. At first I was just numb, but then as it went on, I truly felt that if I let myself cry about it, I may never stop. I still feel that way.
And now, whenever I exercise, I feel horrible afterwards — depressed and wanting to cry.
It sucks. I thought I was crazy, but I googled it, and it turns out that it’s actually pretty common for people who have had a lot of stress — the exercise releases the physical stress and so the emotions are harder to contain.
Weird, huh?
Maybe I’ll go have a good cry in the shower. We’ll see
Blah
So, I’m 200.4
Again.
I thought I did so well yesterday. I did eat kind of late, but I didn’t eat that MUCH, at least, I didn’t think I had.
And, I did Jillian Michael’s 30 Day Shred (I can barely move this morning lol).
I think today I’m going to try something new — I’m not going to eat cheese today. I know that’s going to be tough, because I have some whole grain baked Ziti hanging out in the fridge lol But I think cheese and nuts are something that I’m overindulging in, so I think that I will skip both of those today.
I also think that it’s my time of the month coming up, which I think might have a little bit to do with it. I’m making sure to pay extra attention to how much water I’m drinking today as well :) I’ve numbered my water bottles so that I’ll be able to keep better track of how much I’m drinking.
*sigh* I have to do something. I realize it’s common to plateau every 10-15 lbs, and that’s where I am, but it’s really getting depressing because I haven’t lost quite enough for it to be noticeable. My birthday is Thursday and I’m a bit depressed that I haven’t made more progress.
Posted by mum2monkeys on July 28th, 2008 under General | Comment now »Feeling Down Today
IDK, maybe I’m PMS.
I gained a pound or so over the past couple days, and though I managed to re-lose it, I’m just feeling stagnant. It’s in the 90’s here so I have absolutely ZERO motivation to exercise. And it’s too hot to cook so I’m having trouble deciding what I want to eat — I know I NEED to eat, but I don’t even have the motivation to do that.
I’m just in a yucky mood today. I really feel like the next thing that happens that doesn’t go according to plan is going to set me off crying and I won’t be able to stop.
*sigh*
Calgon, take me away!
Posted by mum2monkeys on July 21st, 2008 under General | Comment now »Blah Blah Fishcakes
10 points to anyone who got the reference 
Okay so anyway, we have a bajillion cans of Tuna thanks to WIC, so I decided to make tuna cakes last night. They were actually pretty good, and that’s coming from someone who doesn’t particularly care for tuna.
3 - 6oz cans tuna, well drained
3 eggs, lightly beaten
1/2 c. parmesean cheese
1/2 cup finely diced peppers (I used both red and green)
1/2 cup finely diced onion
1 TBS lemon juice
1 TBS Worcestershire sauce
about 1/2 - 1 tsp Old Bay Seasoning (I didn’t measure; just eyeball it)
salt and pepper to taste
Smart Balance buttery spread or Olive Oil (Light TASTING, not EVOO — EVOO with scorch)
Mix all the ingredients except the butter/oil. Heat butter/oil in large skillet over medium. Form patties from tuna mixture and drop in the oil. Cook until brown before flipping/moving or they will fall apart. Make sure the skillet doesn’t get dry — you may find you have to add more oil/butter as you cook.
They were surprisingly good. I did find out that you have to drain the tuna REALLY well or else you end up with more of a “seafood hash” than “seafood cakes” lol But, it still tasted really good
Anyway, I’m still under 200, but barely (199.3 now), but, I’ll take barely over not at all haha
We went to the movies today (saw Hellboy II) and I had popcorn with light butter. I know, I know, even without butter it’s bad with too much fat and all that jazz, but it was worth it :P Well, ask me that again tomorrow after my weigh-in and I might be singing a different tune lol
Posted by mum2monkeys on July 17th, 2008 under General | Comment now »Not getting too excited, but…
… I’m under 200 lbs!!! :D
I’m not getting too terribly excited though, because I did see ONEderland about a month ago, and then turned around and gained about 15 lbs. Yikes!
And already, last night, I could feel myself self-sabotaging. I had waaaaay too much chicken for dinner even though I wasn’t hungry. It’s sad. But, I’m very lucky in that I didn’t go back up over 200 lbs when I weighed this morning. I had some oatmeal this morning (yum!) and I have no idea what I’m going to have later. I think I have to have either Chicken Satay or a salad for lunch because we need to go get groceries.
I’m determined not to self sabotage this time dangit! I AM going to get to my goal. I AM going to continue to eat well, and I AM going to continue to exercise :) Once I get to, say, 190, I’ll breathe a little easier
Either way, I feel pretty good about finally being back under 200 I know I’ve still got a ways to go, but I definitely feel a sense of accomplishment
Legs… burning! Lungs… on fire! Feeling…
GREAT!
I just got done with my first “Couch to 5K” workout and boy, did it kick my butt! But I did it! I ran! And it didn’t kill me! lol!
Now I’m taking a well-deserved break and snacking on some freshly roasted chick peas (yum!)
We’re having whole wheat spinach lasagna for dinner tonight It’s going to be NUMMMMMY!
So close!
I weighed this morning and I’m down to 200.4! OMG I’m so close to ONEderland that I can taste it!
Yesterday, I didn’t do great with the eating, but I didn’t do too badly either. Breakfast was a salad (I didn’t feel like eggs) since I knew previously that I hadn’t had nearly enough veggies. Then for lunch/dinner, we went to Golden Corral. I was good! (kinda)
I had a big salad, a rotisserie chicken breast (no skin), steamed broccoli, steamed cauliflower, popcorn shrimp (I know, but it was soooooooooo good) and then for dessert I had fruit with SF whipped cream. It was a small piece of watermelon, two medium pieces of cantaloupe, and four strawberries. So, technically I wasn’t starting Phase 2 until today, but I went ahead and started it last night.
Then for dessert when I got home, I had Peanut Butter Cheesecake (it’s the “crustless silky peanut butter pie” recipe from the 3FC boards) with a little SF chocolate syrup on top.
And! This is where you’ll be proud of me; I walked on the treadmill!! :D I know it sounds like a small accomplishment, but it was hard! I tried to do the “trainer” program but my legs were on fire, so I only did that about 15 minutes before cutting the speed and incline down to a comfortable pace (3.0 mph 3-4 incline). It felt good when I got off, even though I was tired.
Today I’m going to do some strength training. I wish I could find my pilates DVD but I have no idea where it ran off to. I really need to do something about this midsection since it’s stretched to all creation from Z being in there for so danged long lol
This morning, I had another piece of the cheesecake (for those who don’t know, it’s a nut serving, lean protein serving and I think a dairy serving, and NSA, so it’s not like I went to the Cheesecake Factory or something lol)
Posted by mum2monkeys on July 12th, 2008 under General | 1 Comment »Feeling a little better.
The comments on my last post, both on here and on the 3FC SB board, really helped me put things in perspective, and I’m not feeling so down any more.
I did pretty well calorie wise today but I didn’t eat enough veggies, so I’ll probably be feeling that in the morning lol
Breakfast was an bacon (bacos lol), egg (mostly whites), and cheese (lowfat cheddar) scramble that I shared with my son. Lunch…. Okay lunch sucked lol I had a bowl of cherry tomatoes, bacos, lowfat cheddar, and ranch dressing. No, I’m not proud of it, but there it is.
Dinner was chicken stir fry. I did have two servings, but, that’s because I practically skipped lunch and I didn’t want my calories to dip too low since I’m nursing It was really good. It had asparagus, water chestnuts, cauliflower, broccoli, sugar snap peas, and I think bamboo shoots. Oh, and chicken lol
Hopefully I won’t have ballooned in the morning from the soy sauce, but at least if I do, I’ll know that’s what it is.
Tomorrow we’re having Cheddar Loaf for dinner. I can’t wait!
Posted by mum2monkeys on July 10th, 2008 under General | Comment now »Depressed
Let me preface this with saying I know that it will get better, I know that in order to lose weight and keep it off I have to do so slowly, and I know that it took me 9 months to put it on (okay, closer to 11 lol) and so I should give myself at least that much time to take it off.
But.
I’m feeling so down about my looks today.
I’m a photographer by trade, and I wanted to take some pictures of me and my two boys for my mother’s birthday this weekend, so I set up the light and camera settings and blah blah blah so all hubs had to do pretty much was point the camera and push the button. So he took tons of pictures of me and my babies 
And then I saw the pictures.
And my heart just broke.
I knew I was big. I’m obviously trying to do something about it, being over halfway through Phase 1 (and 11 lbs down, btw!). But I’m so disgusted and depressed about what I saw in the pictures.
You know when shows like Tyra have some skinny chick in the “fat suit”? That’s what I look like. My face looks…… swollen for lack of a better word. And my chin? Well, my chin has given birth to a second one apparently.
I’m just so sad that I have to look like a flippin marshmallow in the pictures of me and my kids. I’m sad that they’re going to look back at these and be shocked at how gross and flabby I was. I’m sad that I’m ashamed to show off pictures of me with the most precious fellas in the world.
I’m so depressed. *sigh*
On the very minor bright side though, I’m not quashing my depression with food as I normally would, because I know that would be counterproductive.
But it did ruin my day 
Blah.
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