Hi folks. Sorry I’ve been MIA. I went off-plan and had a difficult time getting myself going down the right road again. *sigh* So, when does this get easier? I’m back on-plan now and working on a loss for Monday’s weigh-in. I’m hopeful.
I’ll be back sometime this weekend to share more. Hope everyone enjoys their weekend and stays on-plan.
Made it through another on-plan day. No exercise yet. I’m feeling very exhausted…mentally and physically. I recognize the symptoms well. I have a major case of sugar withdrawal! I’m hoping to start feeling a bit better tomorrow, however, it’s normally 3-4 days before that spark and pep comes back into my body.
Spent some time reading the maintainer’s thread today. What an inspiring bunch of “losers!” I really want to join their ranks. I must remember to drop in there for a bit of reading when I’m feeling the pull to allow an off-plan meal, day, weekend, etc. and I need a boost to my mojo.
Received an e-mail from the Georgia Ovarian Cancer Organization. They are looking for volunteers to speak at meetings, conventions, etc. The e-mail said they will provide the training. I’m very interested and will have to do some praying and thinking about it. I enjoy speaking in front of people, but I’m not sure that I’m a very inspirational or motivational speaker. The e-mail also brought news of a walk scheduled six months from now. The walk is to raise awareness and funds for research. I’m excited about joining the walk, too. Not sure how much money I can raise as I’m also trying to raise money for the Relay for Life walk in May, but I’m going to try. Every little bit will help.
I’ve been MIA, lost, crazy,confused etc,etc,etc. The old unaccountable off-plan ‘me’ who doesn’t care anymore tried to come back and take over my body. It was a tough battle and the new ‘me’ almost lost, but I’m back on-plan and fighting the fight again. Honestly, this is the only time I’ve ever felt myself in serious danger of totally quitting this lifestyle change. I allowed myself to get caught up in the negative thinking and concentrating on how difficult this is and what I’m giving up. Basically, I had a big ole pity party for myself and decided to rebel. I’m not sure who I thought I was proving a point to?
I forgot about what I’ve gained so far and what I still have to gain from staying on-plan…being healthy, feeling better, more confidence, etc etc etc. It is extremely difficult to get back on-plan today, but I’m finally at the point where I’m thinking again about the alternative and it isn’t very appealing at all. I’m not 100% sure why I allowed myself to go so far away, but I can’t afford to wait until I get it all figured out. That could take years! So, I’m picking myself up yet again and I’m going in the right direction today.
Today was my weigh-in day. I only gained 1.2 pounds. I was expecting a lot more and was expecting to be back in the 230’s. I’m worked very hard to get out of the 230’s, so I’m feeling very optimistic today. I have an enjoyable day of sugar detox ahead of me. Breakfast, lunch and snacks are planned. Hubby has agreed to get back on-plan with me, so dinner will be on-plan, too.
Okay.. a better title might be ‘intermittent slow jogger,’ but I did it! I just completed day 1 of week 1 of the extended C25K program. A whole hour of 30 second runs followed by 4 1/2 minute walks. I feel awesome! Yeah, I’m sweaty and very very exhausted, but so very very proud of myself!
My youngest DD woke me at 5:00 this morning…bad dream. I had trouble falling back to sleep as my brain decided that it was time to do some deep thinking! The main thing on my mind was the struggle I’ve been having lately with staying on-plan. Last week, I was struggling to get my project completed by Friday and I found myself constantly going into the kitchen and looking through the cabinets and the refrigerator…and sometimes grabbing something to eat when I wasn’t hungry and it wasn’t meal or snack time. Then, I crashed and burned over the weekend and went on a binge. Yesterday was another off-plan day. During my early morning think session, I realized that I’ve allowed myself to forget the main reasons why I’m doing this. Yes, I want to look better…who wouldn’t? But, I also want to be a healthy active person for the remainder of my life. No more sitting on the sidelines and allowing my weight to hold me back. I don’t want to let life pass me by. I want to travel, to enjoy life, to be independent for as long as possible. I want to be like my Dad! I had lost my focus, but, for the first time in a while, I’m feeling 100% optimistic and determined to get this weight off, to develop a daily exercise habit and to eat the foods that benefit my body the most! Today, I’m having one of my 1200 calorie days and will do 60 minutes of walk/run on the treadmill. I’ve found my mojo! :carrot:
Today is my official weekly weigh-in day and I’ve gained 1.4 pounds. I’m so glad the weekend is over. It was not a great on-plan weekend for me and I’m ready to get my head back into my plan. I’m not 100% sure of what exactly happened. I don’t think it was one thing in particular. I think I just allowed a series of stressful days build up my frustration and anxiety until I exploded and turned to my familiar remedy…food. But, my mantra is “Quitting is not an option anymore” so I’m still here and trying to get this weight off and learn new ways of coping with the stresses of life.
Last night, I managed to remember to put on the crock pot for my steelcut oatmeal. So, I’m starting the day off on the right foot with my healthy breakfast. I also realize that I must make exercising a priority despite my heavy workload. I must make myself a priority again. I’ve decided that I’ll only work occasional overtime from now on. My health is too important and my family needs me, too.