The Last Straw

I think there are a few of us who are right at our six month mark in the blogging thing, so happy sixmonthiversary to you! I am taking a few minutes to look back over where I was six months ago. Back then, I had lost 10% of my body weight. Right now, I am at 21%. Back then, I was complaining about my belly fat and right now…uh, yeah. Still complaining. Back then, I was in the 180’s and right now I am in the 150’s. Back then, I was doing 30 minutes on the elliptical. Right now, I am trying to work up to running two miles consistently and eventually hopefully running three miles.

That said, today at the track was just sort of meh. My two miles (that I had intended to run)  took 25 minutes due to some walking breaks and a water break. I finished up three miles total, but it was just nothing that spectacular today. I seriously need something else to mix in with this. I try to watch and learn from what y’all do, with your gym work outs and boot camps and exercise videos and biking and all that. But I just can’t seem to get myself motivated to commit to anything. That is an issue that I mentioned six months ago that I STILL have done nothing about!!! I want a new goal to alternate with the running goals.  I think I need to mix it up so that the monotony of today does not become the norm. But I know me and I know how I feel about this and I know my lack of motivation. So I continue to toss around the idea of joining the gym, but I am so scared to do that. I am afraid I will be uncomfortable and then not go. But I know that I will not ever get my arms toned up without it. I got stupid and hurt my wrist doing push ups like a month ago and the thing still hurts! This is why I clearly need somebody showing me how to do things the right way. Maybe I will call the gym AGAIN and ask about rates. 

***Ok. I think I have come to a decision about the gym thing. Last spring I wanted a treadmill. Desperately just HAD to have a treadmill. But I told myself that if I was truly committed to running, I would run wherever I could until we could afford the treadmill. So I started going to the track, thinking as soon as we could sort of afford it, I would get a treadmill. Well, now I don’t want one. Not that there is anything wrong with treadmills, I just think me wanting a treadmill was more about trying to find an answer in “things” rather than from within. You know, the whole “if I only had a _____, I could really get in shape”. Ok, so now I am seeing the same pattern with just a different word in the blank. instead of treadmill, it is gym membership. So the conclusion I have come to is that I once again need to prove to myself that I am serious about this. So I need to commit to strength training my upper body at home with what I have (plus maybe a couple of more weights) and go from there. Then I can look back in a few months and re-evaluate the whole gym thing.