Starting weight:  285.2
Calories/Carbs Goals (limits):        1400  / 30.0
Monday’s calories & net carbs:       1072  /  31.3
Yesterday’s calories & net carbs:    1087  /  37.9
Monday’s exercise:    none
Yesterday’s exercise:    2 hours cleaning
Weight Monday:: 240.0    Weight Yesterday:: 240.2    Today:  240.2
Change today::  -0.0 lbs.         Loss-so-far:   45.0 lbs.          bmi:  45.38

Things are not moving as quickly as expected on the bathroom renovation project.  Hubby has a toothache and so he’s not been sleeping well at night.  He’s going to the dentist Friday morning.

I was chagrined - what a weird word! - I wrote it and then actually stopped to look it up:

Okay, I was using the word right.  It’s one of those words people never say out loud, though.  At least, I’ve never heard anyone say it out loud.  Anyway as I was saying…

I was chagrined to see that my weight went back up above the 240-mark and it’s stayed there for the past three days.  I’m thinking tomorrow I’m gonna say goodbye to the 240’s forever, though.  I just feel it in my bones! 

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CARTOON OF THE DAY

6548

Starting weight:  285.2
Calories/Carbs Goals (limits):        1400  / 30.0
Friday’s calories & net carbs:         1065  /  20.2
Saturday’s calories & net carbs:     1362  /  34.0
Yesterday’s calories & net carbs:   1185  /  27.3
Friday’s exercise:    none
Saturday’s exercise:    3 hours shopping/walking
Yesterday’s exercise:    2 hours cleaning
Weight Friday:: 239.6    Weight Saturday:: 239.6   
Weight Yesterday:: 240.6    Today:  240.0
Change today::  -0.6 lbs.   Loss-so-far:   45.2 lbs.  bmi:  45.35

When I look up there at the last three days, it looks like I haven’t done anything in the exercise department but I have barely sat down to catch my breath!!  I did have some recovery time on Friday from all the redecorating efforts - I didn’t have a step stool or step ladder, so I stood on a chair while I was painting.  The good news is - 45 lbs. ago I couldn’t haul my ass up on a chair.  Could not do it.  The bad news is - Though I can now haul my ass up on a chair, after doing it approximately a bzillion times last Wednesday and Thursday, OMG my knees and hips were killin’ me!   But I’m all better now.

Hubby loved the living room.  Loved the couch, loved the new chair, loved the rug and the bookcases.  I think most of all, he loved the fact that the room had been transformed and he didn’t have to lift a finger to make it happen.

So I told him the bathroom was next.  That with him or without him, I’m gonna do it.  Now.  Before Christmas.

The bathroom, however, is a significantly more difficult job.  We live in an older house and there are some structural issues in there.  Immediately he jumped on the remodeling/redecorating bandwagon and started making plans for what needed to be done.  Saturday we spent all day shopping, going from one store to the next, getting lots of neat stuff.  I was so excited!

I have never, ever before purchased a toilet.  And never in my wildest dreams would I have thought I would be this excited over such a purchase!

Yesterday he started ripping our bathroom up.  Removed all the trim, took the mirror off the wall, removed the cabinet, the baseboards, and the old flooring.  It looks like a shambles in there and I couldn’t be happier!!!
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CARTOON OF THE DAY

6409

Starting weight:  285.2
Calories/Carbs Goals (limits):  1600  / 40.0
Wednesday’s calories & net carbs:    1240  /  32.9
Yesterday’s calories & net carbs:    1135  /  12.2
Wednesday’s exercise:    6 hours cleaning / painting
Yesterday’s exercise:    12 hours cleaning / painting
Weight Wednesday:: 242.0    Weight Yesterday:: 240.4    Today:  239.6
Change today::  -0.8 lbs.   Loss-so-far:   45.6 lbs.  bmi:  45.27

Hey I was doing a happy dance two days ago, so I must be doing an overjoyed dance today!  WOOOOOOT!!!!!!!  OMG I saw two-THIRTY-something on the scale today!!!  It’s been a long, long time since I’ve been this weight.  *deep contented sigh*  I’m pretty happy with this week’s weight loss (especially after last week’s gain).

I barely ate yesterday, I was so busy.  I ended up with 1135 calories only because I ate 2 ounces of macadamia nuts in an effort to bring the total up because I was at only 729 calories and 9.4 carbs for the whole day!  What was I doing that I couldn’t stop and eat?  My sons and I pulled a “While You Were Out” on my husband!!

I’ve been unhappy with our living room for a while and I said something about it one day last week to my husband.  I told him that even after 10 years together in our house, I still don’t feel like it’s “mine.”  We (my 3 kids and I) moved into his house and he had all his stuff and it was all arranged the way he wanted it and he was, like, attached to his stuff.  About six years ago I talked him into making some changes but he still pretty much kept all his stuff.  For example, we put new carpeting in the living room, painted the walls and trim new colors, changed the window treatments, bought a nice entertainment center and put new pictures on the walls.  But the furniture remained exactly the same.  Same coffee table, same end tables, same recliner chair (ugly brown plaid), and same brown sectional sofa (uck I hate that sofa) and the fact that it’s a sectional means that you can only arrange the room one way. 

So anyway, Hubby said, “If you want to make changes, go ahead.  Make our house feel like ‘our’ house.”

Ohhhhhhh-kay!  If you say so!!!  Hehhehheh!

So on Tuesday I went shopping.  If you have read my blog for any length of time, you know that my hubby and I are thrift-store shoppers.  I don’t mind used stuff as long as 1) it’s in good shape and 2) I get a great deal!  There’s a thrift store near here that has nice gently-used furniture for good prices, so I started there.  Amazingly, I found a double-recliner sofa that was brand-new.  Never used.  Absolutely beautiful.  And guess what, it was burgundy, the same color as our living room carpet.

So I bought it.  And a chair.  And then I went shopping some more.

I went to Big Lots and bought two white bookcases, a rug and a burgundy pillow.  I went to Wal-Mart and bought a lamp and two new lampshades for my other lamps.  I bought material to cover the ugly chair and also the two end-tables.  I bought paint - bright white for the walls, burgundy for the trim.  I bought extension cords.  And spackle.  And paint brushes.  (I had rollers and pans at home.)

While Hubby was at work, my sons dragged the old sectional couch out of the house and then my 16yo son and I cleaned and emptied the room and began to prepare for painting.  When Hubby got home that night he was surprised to find us painting the trim - but far from done with even that.  We pretended that was the extent of the surprise - a new paint job.  That was Wednesday.

Yesterday morning at work I started putting the bookcases together and then as soon as Hubby went to work, we kicked it into gear.  Younger son and I finished painting the trim while older son washed down the walls from ceiling to floor in preparation for the new white paint.  The furniture was delivered in the early evening.  We ran out and bought a Christmas tree.  By 10pm we were arranging the new furniture, laying the new rug, and re-hooking up the TV.  At 11:30 when Hubby got home, the tree had lights on it (we’ll decorate it together later) and the books and videos weren’t put away, nor were the pictures hung back up, but the room looked cozy and best of all… different! 

My sons and I stood huddled in the newly-decorated room and watched as Hubby came in.  He saw the Christmas tree first and said, “Awwww,” then turned and saw the new furniture and said, “Sh*t!!!”  (in a good way, lol).

SO - my workout yesterday was 12 HOURS LONG!!

 
Here’s my new couch, rug, chair, and (empty) bookcases! 

6322

Starting weight:  285.2
Calories/Carbs Goals (limits):  1400  / 30.0
Yesterday’s calories & net carbs:    1229  /  27.7
Yesterday’s exercise:    1 hour shopping/walking
Weight Yesterday:: 243.4    Today:  242.0
Change today::  -1.4 lbs.   Loss-so-far:   43.2 lbs.  bmi:  45.73

*Happy Dance*  *Happy Dance*  *Happy Dance*

Woooohoooo I finally saw the scale move below where I was before Thanksgiving!  Six days.  Six whole days of progress lost - for one day of indulgence.  Now, granted, there’s no guarantee that I would have made any progress during that particular six days - I’ve certainly had thresholds that lasted longer than six days.  But the potential for loss, the possibility was there.  I’m thinking … it wasn’t worth it.

This is my life now.  This is the way I eat.  It actually felt unnatural, eating the stuff I was eating.  Unnatural and a little unreal.  Yeah, the food tasted good - but it really didn’t last long.  The mmm-yummy-omg-this-is-so-delicious-sensation while chewing and swallowing my food - it was over with pretty quickly.  Okay, take, for example, the chocolate pie with graham cracker crust that I ate three pieces of that day.  Each slice took me, oh, about five minutes to consume, only because I stretched it out and made it last that long.  I probably ate each slice in about ten bites, so that would work out to two bites per minute, or one every thirty seconds.  So for each piece of pie, I experienced the flavor for 30 seconds - approximately 10 times per slice or 30 times altogether over the course of the day.

So what’s the point of this?  Well, if my goal was to experience the flavor, did I have to experience it 30 times?  I hadn’t tasted real chocolate pudding made with real sugar for at least four months.  Would I have been less satisfied if I had experienced the flavor for 30 seconds - but only just once?  If I had only ingested one bite, would I have spent the rest of the day feeling deprived because I did not get to experience that flavor 29 more times?  10 more times?  1 more time?

When we go out to eat, sometimes my husband orders vanilla ice cream for dessert.  When it arrives, he hands me his spoon and I take one small bite.  I let that spoonful melt and I close my eyes while I experience the flavor.  And then I’m good.  I don’t need any more.  Just that one bite satisfies my desire to experience that flavor.

The bottom line is this:  If all I’m having is one bite, just to experience a flavor, I can experience any damn flavor I want.  And still be totally on plan. 

That’s good to know.  =D

CARTOON OF THE DAY

6259

Starting weight:  285.2
Calories/Carbs Goals (limits):  1400  / 30.0
Yesterday’s calories & net carbs:    1277  /  39.8
Yesterday’s exercise:    none
Weight Yesterday:: 243.8    Today:  243.4
Change today::  -0.4 lbs.   Loss-so-far:   41.8 lbs.  bmi:  45.99

I had to run several errands this evening and my 16yo son went with me.  Since we were out and about, he suggested that we stop by Taco Bell and order soft tacos - and then just eat the meat but not the soft tacos themselves.  Instead, we could go home and transplant the meat into our low-carb tortillas.  I thought it sounded good (no cooking required, that always sounds good to me!) but I thought there might be an easier way to accomplish the same thing.

I asked the lady at the register if I could buy a bowl of just the taco meat - the ground beef stuff.  Turns out that yes, I could do that.  The charge for such a thing is just 50 cents for each taco portion.  So I ordered 5 bucks worth, the equivalent of 10 taco portions.  What I ended up getting was two bowls of cooked and seasoned ground beef, plenty for both of us.  Kevin ate 3 decent-sized burritos but I decided to skip the tortillas and ate about a half cup of taco meat with shredded cheese and sour cream.  And a big ol’ romaine salad with it.  Whoa it was really good!

I haven’t been exercising.  I got out of the “everyday” habit and things keep coming up, stuff I have to do, places I have to go to - for whatever reason I’m just not doing it.  I need to make the time. 

I have a lot to do both at work and at home, between now and Christmas.  Some of my exercise time might just end up be housecleaning time instead.  If I can manage to work up a sweat while cleaning, then I’d be happy with that.

Edited to change “Wednesday” to “Tuesday” - I ran around all day yesterday thinking it was Wednesday, LOL!

6162

Starting weight:  285.2
Calories/Carbs Goals (limits):  1600  / 40.0
Yesterday’s calories & net carbs:    1793  /  45.5
Yesterday’s exercise:    20 min. elliptical
Weight Yesterday:: 244.4    Today:  243.8
Change today::  -0.6 lbs.   Loss-so-far:   41.4 lbs.  bmi:  46.07

I added a new number to my header today: my BMI.  This never used to mean anything to me before, but it sure does now.  When I started this weight-loss journey at 285.2 lbs, my bmi was 53.89 which means I was well into “morbidly obese.” 

Morbid.  If you look up the definition of morbid or morbidly, it means sickly or diseased.  The four different dictionaries at dictionary.com all refer to illness - but none of them come out and say what it really means:  “You’re gonna die.”  Yet they all do refer to the root word, “mori,” which means “to die.”  Interesting that dictionary definitions would spare us that ummm, morbid spin on the word - yet in its general usage in our English-speaking population, I would bet that’s how people understand it.  If it’s morbid, it means it’s on the road to death.  Or at least pertaining to death.  Yes?

Funny, I didn’t feel like I was dying.

But the truth of the matter is, I was well on my way.  And as far as the numbers game goes, I still am.  But hot-damn!!!  My death number is decreasing almost daily!!!

So I’m gonna keep it up there in the header all nice and big and pink (to match my cool bike, sterling, lol) and I’m gonna watch that number creep down and down until it’s no longer “morbidly obese” - just “obese.”  And then I’m gonna watch that number creep towards “overweight.”  And then, finally … to the “healthy weight” range.

———————–*————————

I screwed up last night.  Ever since the baby shower, there’s been leftover m&m’s on top of the microwave.  I didn’t look at ‘em.  I didn’t crave ‘em.  I didn’t think about ‘em.  Until last night, late.  They were calling to me and so I let myself have some macadamia nuts (high in calories but really low in carbs) thinking if I just had a snack the craving for the m&m’s would go away.  Didn’t work.  Finally I just said f*** it and had a handful.  Messed up my carbs for the day and sent my calories over too.

I’m thinking it’s because I had sugar.  I haven’t had an overwhelming crave like that for months and just now out of the blue I have one?  I don’t think it’s a coincidence that this came so soon after taking Thanksgiving day “off.”  I need to be extra, extra careful about my sugar consumption until I have this back under control!

6001

Starting weight:  285.2
Calories/Carbs Goals (limits):  1600  / 40.0
Yesterday’s calories & net carbs:    1534  /  33.6
Yesterday’s exercise:    2.4 miles real bike + 20 min. elliptical
Weight Yesterday:: 245.4    Today:  244.4
Change today::  -1.0 lbs.   Loss-so-far:  40.8 lbs.

Earlier this week, one of my hubby’s best friends died.  It was totally unexpected.  Jim was 63 years old, active, still ran his own business (owned, maintained, and managed nine residential properties).  He was home alone, in his favorite chair, watching TV (probably football), when he fell asleep and never woke up.

Yesterday was the memorial service for Jim, and people took turns getting up and sharing stories.  My husband wanted to go up there but knew he’d break down into tears and so he just held my hand and didn’t budge.  “Besides,” he said later to a group of Jim’s men-friends and men-relatives, “there were children present and most of the stories I had about Jim couldn’t have been shared anyway.”  His comment was met with laughter and general sounds of agreement. 

Everyone at the service was just wrecked that this man who was so full of life and humor and love, could possibly be gone.

Jim’s sudden and unexpected passing saddened me, yes, but it also scared the hell outta me.  My husband is only 46 years old and is in general good health, but during his last checkup his doctor was worried about both his cholesterol and triglycerides levels.  I have tried to help him to lower his fatty food intake but he is such a picky eater that I honestly don’t know what to feed him. 

He eats chicken (battered and fried only, I can’t get him to even try “naked” grilled chicken), ham, hamburgers, spaghetti with meat sauce (won’t eat it without ground beef in it), hot dogs, fried bologna sandwiches, grilled cheese sandwiches, macaroni & cheese, biscuits with sausage gravy, sausage, bacon, potato chips, french fries, mashed potatoes, corn niblets, corn on the cob, cheetohs, apple pie, pumpkin pie, and reese’s peanut butter cups.  Oh, and he’ll eat turkey once a year.  That’s it.  I can’t suggest other foods because he just won’t eat them.  Won’t.

Losing a loved one brings our own mortality to mind, and so yeah, I’m scared of losing him.  I talked to him about it yesterday after the memorial service and he said he didn’t know what to do about it either.  “I can’t eat rabbit food, you know that.” 

*Sigh.*  I know.

5918

Starting weight:  285.2
Calories/Carbs Goals (limits):  1600  / 40.0
Yesterday’s calories & net carbs:    Thanksgiving - no counting!
Yesterday’s exercise:    5 miles real bike!
Weight Yesterday:: 242.4    Today:  245.4
Change today::  +3.0 lbs.   Loss-so-far:  39.8 lbs.

Three pounds.  THREE.  In one day, I obliterated ten days of progress?!  Yes, I ate yesterday.  Yes, I ate whatever the hell I wanted to eat yesterday!  Yes, I totally enjoyed all the tastes I experienced but was it worth three whole pounds?!?  Three pounds seems a bit extreme, especially since I was feeling all proud of us for doing this:

We brought our bikes with us to my brother’s house and after our Thanksgiving feast we (Hubby and I plus our two sons who brought their bikes on the back of my older son’s car) went for a five-mile ride!  The first half of the ride we took our time, meandering through the unfamiliar neighborhood, but then on the way back we stepped it up and raced back to my brother’s house, worked up a sweat and everything.  It was wonderful and I’m thinking we should bring the bikes to every event which includes such a big meal (Christmas and Easter, too).

Still, though… three pounds?

Well … I haven’t ridden my bike in a while - I just went and looked and the last time was October 19, and the time before that was September 1st - so yeah - I’m a little rusty - and yeah - today my knees are feeling a bit swollen.  So maybe just maybe some of that three pounds is water.  Maybe.  Regardless, I’m definitely going to put in some time on the elliptical today.

I spent some time catching up on my blog-reading this morning and some people posted lists of the yummy foods they indulged in yesterday - those were fun to read!  I’m almost afraid to post my list because OMG I did indulge … but I will say that I took much smaller portions this year than I ever have before!  And at lunchtime ,with the exception of one extra helping of baked beans (and also a bit of dressing), I didn’t go back for seconds.  Anyway, I’m going to relive the experience while I write my list.  =D

Breakfast - two cinnamon rolls, fresh and hot from the oven.  Oh, and one glass of real milk.  I do miss real milk, a little.  (By “real milk,” I mean 2%.  The only milk I’ve had for 4 months is low-carb.  Urg - not the same.)

Lunch - turkey, gravy, dressing, baked beans, broccoli casserole, cranberry sauce, fruit salad, small helping of mashed potatoes, two dinner rolls, and a slice of chocolate-pudding-pie.

Snacks (throughout the seven hours we were there) - another slice of chocolate-pudding-pie, one mint oreo, one thin chocolate cookie, four cashews, and four dark chocolate m&m’s.  (In previous years I would have been grazing all day - my brother puts out snacks all over his house!)

Supper - turkey, gravy, dressing, baked beans, broccoli casserole, fruit salad.  No potatoes, no rolls (I decided to just stick with my favorite favorites).

Late Night Snack - I saved one last slice of chocolate-pudding-pie to have just before midnight.  (I left the other five leftover slices at my brother’s house so I wouldn’t be tempted beyond that!)

*Sigh*  It was fun while it lasted.  And I guess I’ll just have to wait to see what kind of impact it will all have in the long run.

5813

Starting weight:  285.2
Calories/Carbs Goals (limits):  1400  / 30.0
Yesterday’s calories & net carbs:    1345 / 34.9
Yesterday’s exercise:    none
Weight Yesterday:: 243.2    Today:  242.4
Change today::  -0.8 lbs.   Loss-so-far:  42.8 lbs.

In a comment to yesterday’s post, Joy asked me where one could purchase ketone testing strips.  My first thought was that I’d answer that question in today’s blog entry.  (Yes, I realize that it’s 4am the following day but since I haven’t been to sleep yet it sure feels like “today” still!)

(What am I doing up at 4 am?!?!  I had no idea it was that late.  Hey - Happy Thanksgiving everyone!!!)

ANYWAY - as I was saying - I started out thinking I’d add a sentence or two to my blog entry to answer Joy’s question.  That’s all it would take - a sentence or two.  But then I had another thought.  And another one.  And before I knew it, I was well on my way to writing a freakin’ book.

And thus, we have Eileen still at her keyboard at 4 a.m.  =D

SO, please take a look at my brand-spankin’-new page I created…! 

EILEEN’S LOW-CARB SURVIVAL KIT:
http://3fatchicks.com/diet-blogs/eileen2blean/low-carb/

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5665

Starting weight:  285.2
Calories/Carbs Goals (limits):  1400  / 30.0
Sunday’s calories & net carbs:   1208 / 24.3
Yesterday’s calories & net carbs:    1074 / 18.3
Sunday’s exercise:    none
Yesterday’s exercise:    9 loads of laundry  =D
Weight Sunday:: 243.4    Weight Yesterday:: 244.0    Today:  243.2
Change today::  -0.8 lbs.   Loss-so-far:  42.0 lbs.

Bawk-baaaawwwwk-bawk-bawk.  If you are what you eat, then I am a chicken.

I’ve eaten a lot of chicken lately!  Chicken and salads.  Tasty.  Filling.  Really low in calories.  So low that on days when I have grilled chicken twice, I barely log in a thousand calories.  One of the waitresses at the restaurant that we frequent asked me, “Has it been agony?  Do you walk around hungry all the time?”  I was like ohmygod no!  I’m seldom hungry and if I do get hungry it’s only because I forgot to eat.

What?  Eileen forgot to EAT?!?

I’ve forgotten to pay the electric bill.  I’ve forgotten to fill up my husband’s Jeep with gas.  I’ve even forgotten to charge my cell phone.  But EAT?  The old Eileen would never forget to eat.  The old Eileen waited for each new opportunity to eat, anticipating and planning the next meal/snack/hidden treat while still chewing and swallowing the current one.  Surely a person like that wouldn’t forget to EAT.  Ai-yi-yi!

——————————————————————–

A while back I found a store that sells low-carb bread and I was so excited!  Only 1g carb per slice, this bread was hearty and filling and yummy.  I bought a bunch of it and put it in my freezer. 

It wasn’t long after that, that I tested negative for ketosis.  I thought, “Crap!  Must have been the popcorn I’ve been eating!”  So I dropped my carbs for a couple days - and still, negative.  After about five days I finally figured out that it was something I was still eating.  Something that I was counting as low that maybe wasn’t so low. 

So I stopped eating the low-carb bread.  Bingo!  The stick turned purple-pink!  Darn!!!

So I’m back to baking.  Tonight I made low-carb rolls which will work for hamburger buns (woohooo gotta get me some ground turkey and make zeusburgers!) or sloppy-joe buns (got some sloppy joes in the fridge, gonna have that tomorrow!) or just for a nice bread-like treat with a salad.  They look good and are exactly the right texture - but they do have a bit of that carbquick/carbalose aftertaste.  *Sigh*  Bettah than nothin’ though!!

5544