Fighting the Dark Cloud of pudge!!

I have been meaning to write…and then I forget.  Sort of like dieting…where I forget I am supposed to be good until I have finished the chocolate bar!  Hey in a hectic world this can happen!

 Like everyone else, my stress has been high lately.  I gained but it is starting to come down.  I find it interesting that my dog and I gain at the same time and lose at the same time.  I wonder if I look like him?!  I certainly hope I have less facial hair!

All in all, life is going pretty well.  Maybe I should dwell on that and stop complaining about what is going wrong?!  At the end of the day, I suppose as long as they do not have to bury me in a piano case I should be grateful.  Of course I am opting for cremation so I guess I needn’t worry?!

I raise a WW 2 pt bar to you all!

Shari

 As far as unveilings go, my Dad’s was a nice one.  No typos in the headstone.  About 30 people at the cemetary and 60 at the condo (partyroom).  Today there was a memorial for him, and others, at his old nursing home.  Mom and I stopped by and visited the nurses on his old floor. 

Now Imust tackle the “what to do with the food left over” syndrome.  We actually bought relatively healthy foods, but you know the egg salad, tuna salad et al contain things I don’t even want to know about. Today I took a salad with some tuna salad on it for lunch.  I also took some watermelon and canteloupe from the fruit platter we ordered as well as a low fat yogurt.  I made tea at work rather than buying a cafe au lait at Starbucks.  Oh and Ihad a 2 pt bar!

Of course, I was called into a meeting at lunchtime BEFORE I got to my lunch.  Even still I only had a 1/4 sandwich from that platter.  Then I had my lunch.  Ok, there was also an orange in my lunch but I never got to that.

 At the Memorial there were cookies but I didn’t have any.  I was full from my salad, fruit, yogurt and 2 pt bar.  Oh, did I mention the 4 smallish easter eggs someone gave me and told me to eat right away (so I did becuase I can follow directions!)

 At dinner we brought out the bread, and the cheese (I refrained) and the tuna salad, salmon salad, smoked salmon etc.  There was not a lot of each left over when you looked at it, but there was ample for a meal.  I am still full several hours later. *sigh*  And, of course, the chocolate covered strawberries. 

 Add into the mix the odd nibble of this or that which i managed and I am sure I had a zillion ww points.

Do I feel any better having eaten it all?  I feel like a human egg …an egg with arms and legs.  It has been a while since I was such a glutton…but obviously not too long a while or I wouldn’t have this blog!

So, I could drown my sorrows in more food or call it a day.  Quote Scarlett O’Hara “Tomorrow is another day” and move on.  I prefer the latter.  Really, I couldn’t face another piece of food right now…even if someone gave me direction!

Trod onward, Leah, Luke and Hans!

As we get closer to my Dad’s unveiling, I am finding it harder to stay focussed on losing weight.  Maybe I shouldn’t focus on that and instead focus on the fact that it is a celebration of my Dad’s life and possibly some closure, for me, around his passing in January. 

We (well, Mom) have ordered a ton of food.  I keep reminding myself of my wheat allergy, which cuts out a ton of fattening options, but as my only allergy symptom is dry itchy skin, sometimes the wheat products get the better of me.

 I went to WW today. Ok, I did, but I didn’t.  As I want to budget my money right now, and as I never lost an ounce last time I joined, I simply go and buy 2pt bars.  I love them.  When I think an entire box of those is about  equal to a regular chocolate bar in points, I figure buying them is ok.  Eating them is also ok.  And no, I do not eat the entire box, but it is nice to know I can!!!

So far I have lost 6 pounds. Not bad I suppose.  Yesterday it was 6.5.  C’est la vie.  No need to put unnecessary pressure on myself when Dad’s unveiling is tomorrow.  I have appropriate clothes that fit.  That is all I should worry about.  Mom insists that I make a speech tomorrow.  How uncomfortable is that?  Ok, I don’t mind speech making, I just find the topic/situation uncomfortable.  Guess it could be worse..I could have the fear of public speaking I had as a teenager.

 Choolate?  Is that you???

Shari

This weekend is the memorial for my Dad.  He passed away on Jan 15 after many years of having to face the obstacles associated with Parkinsons disease.  (I am walking to raise money for Parkinsons research in Sept, if anyone wants to sponsor me the website is https://secure.e2rm.com/registrant/personalPage.aspx?EventID=10711&LangPref=en-CA&RegistrationID=287540).  Anyway, I had hoped to lose weight for Dad’s memorial.  Instead I gained..ballooning to 203 last week.  I am now back to 199.  Not pretty but at least some clothes fit.

This week I took vegetable cabbage rolls for lunch.  It is a recipe I got at a Weight Watchers, or somehere similar, many many years ago.  They are filling and have virtually no calories.  As of today I am down to 199.  At least it is less than 200.  At least I can wear something other than jeans to the Memorial (as now other clothes actually fit again!)  Ok, I had bought some black pants to be on the safe side!

As for my aspirations…well I was once told that the goal doesn’t change, just the timeline. My timeline for weightloss has changed over and over again.  But I think I am onto something good.  No, I will not (and cannot) eat those cabbage rolls every day until I hit a reasonable weight.  BUT I see that I can eat something mainly made of vegetables and be somewhat full.  Incidentally, I added to cabbage roll lunch a 2pt bar from WW (I love those…ok, I have about 2 a day but they give me the love of a chocolate bar with much much fewer calories), a piece of fruit (or two) and a small fat free yogurt. 

 I buy the Source brand of yogurt in what that look like kiddie portions.  After all, if portion size is out of whack and kids are getting obese on their portions and we are getting obese on our portions, maybe we should be eating the new kid sized portions?!

So, to recap, I have not really lost my aspiration (that is why I put the ???? in the title) I just did not meet the immediate goal.  Incidentally, I still hope to lose a pound before Sunday.

Cheers!!
Shari