butterfly emerging soon

Well, well, well we are here at the end of a month and the end of a year. I am actually very excited about starting my resolutions/plans for the year of 2009. I am so thrilled about a few things.

1. I will reach my goal of 165 by the end of June (or darned close)
2. I will reach my ultimate goal of 155 by the end of 2009
3. I will be a runner
4. I will be in remission
5. I will be a whole new person physically with new habits and better health

When I started this blog (originally under the name of (Finding Joy in the journey of weight loss) back in march of 2008 I was over 263 pounds and felt so hopeless , so fat, so ugly, so like an alien in my own body, so out of control. Now I am not thin by any means and have been off plan for almost a month now. But I am different, changing, I realize that I am so much more than my body, I have hope, and I CAN be in control. Wednesday , January 1st. 2009 I start to take my control back once again.  LOOK at Sterling and how she in one years time completely changed her outer being and found herself in so many ways. She is such a wonderful example of how to do this and we can be a success!  So many of you inspire me! Too many to name all of you. I am so grateful and thankful for this site because it is one of the best tools I have in this weight loss battle! 

Well off to my day of motherhood, housekeeping, etc….. I will chit chat with you all later. Toodles!

 ~~~~~~ 1 p.m.

I have been such the lazy one all week long! I do not have to start teaching again till next Monday so I am finding that I have a LOT of extra time on my hands. I am reading, watching movies, going online, spending extra time with my two youngest, doing a tad of cleaning, more reading, the budget, oh yeah and EATING!  BLAH!

FOOD TODAY!

• 2 egg whites
• 1 whole wheat toast
• 1 orange
• 2 cups grapes
• apple
• 2 veggie patties
• 1 serv. tater tots  (OMgoodness!)
• turkey burger
• grilled onions with mushrooms
• 2 % cheese
• 2 rye toast
• 1 giamt dill pickle
• pringles
• apple
• ww fudge bar
• ww cake

That is it so far.    Even with all that I have been eating my weight has been holding steady. Thank the Lord!!!!!  I wonder if it is all the fruit and water???

Toodles!

~~~~~~~~ 7 :30 pm

10   9    8   7   6   5   4   3   2   1      okay it is too early for the countdown but I am tired and going to bed soon. So Happy New Year all you sisterchicks!!!!

See you in 2009!

Toodles!

I for one am so glad that changes are coming my way. Today I am going to concentrate on a few goals.

1. drinking at least 10 glasses of plain water
2. eating at least two servings of raw fruit and or vegetables at every meal and snack
3. taking all of my vitamins
4. no more junk even if I am over my points in fruit and veggies

Thats it for today and Wednesday. Now here are my NEW YEARS RESOLUTIONS.

1. get down to 165 by the end of June
2. be a runner even if short distance by summer 2009
3. journal my food intake and workouts
4. have the doctor declare me in remission in 2009
5. be more active in my faith and church
6. be a more hands on, patient mom
7. be a more loving, less mouthy , more patient wife
8. be a better friend, and blogger friend

I think that is enough for the year. That is a lot of work but I think I am up for it. I know some of those are not diet related but I like to be held accountable and to be honest a lot of mine are all connected. Who else is making resolutions?  Toodles!

PS   you know what i just found out?????  OLESTRA is baaaaaad for you!! I do not mean digestion either! If you ingest it in a meal it blocks most of the nutrients that you eat with the olestra food. OMgoodness! This explains a LOT!!!! So I need to go back to baked wheat pretzels and baked lays instead of fat free (OLESTRA) type stuff. GROAN!!!!! I knew it was too good to be true!  This explains my hair loss!!!!!!!

~~~~~5 :45 p.m.

Looooong day. My boys are all starting to bounce off of the walls. Games , DVD’s, books, and toys now seem old to them even though they have had them for mere  days. They do not want to go out into the cold and they are getting on each others nerves and now mine!  I love my DS’s all four of them but YIKES I need a vacation from THEIR vacation!

I did get to start and finish a book though. I found this mystery at the library that looked really good and was able to read it in two days. Mostly because DH was ON duty more than OFF duty. It is good to have him home for some normal hours once again. 

We just finished dinner and I have to say it was gross, sick and yucky! I made a roast (I cut all the fat off). I made it with a ton of root vegtables and green beans. It was just bland even though I added a ton of spices and some herbs. Not my type of food I guess. 

FOOD TODAY

• banana
• ruby red grapefruit with splendra
• 2 cups grapes
• two soy chicken patties
• baked cheetos (2 serv.)
• 1 orange
• 1 WW Latte
• 2 cups stewed carrots, turnips, onions, celery, with 3 ounces roast
• 1 biscuit
• 1 WW cake

Did I even spell that right???? Is it ALI or Alli?  The more I look the less I am sure!      Well however it is spelled it is true enough. 

Today was quite the busy day. DH had to pull duty from 3 till 11 tonight and with a one hour drive home I will not see him till close to midnight. I feel for the poor guy who has to get up at 4 something again in the morning to go right back on duty at the airport. Here is my chant and mantra for us in this. We need the money!!!!  It will be a blessing later when we get the check but until then this SUCKS!  oops sorry stinks!!!    I have made a decision. I am going to workout to DVD’s, reg. & step aerobics, treadmill, weights, and sit ups at home. At least for the winter. The country roads are crappy at best and often they don’t plow them where we are for up to 24 hours AFTER the snow. Often in winter DH will not get home until waaay after 4 p.m. so at least until spring this is my plan. I am hoping that by spring that I will be RUNNING on the treadmill. That’s right you heard me right I said running!   LOLOLOLOL   Okay right now I find that funny as well. me run??? Yes!!!! me!  I am going to make out my list of resolutions and post them Tuesday at some point in time.  Well that is all for now chickies! You all take care and see you later or in the morning. Toodles!

FOOD YESTERDAY

• 1 salami and cheese with horseradish sandwich
• 3 cups of grapes
• 1 serv. baked chips
• 1 apple
• 1 clementine
• 2 cups peanut butter ice cream with fudge sauce  (CRINGE)!!!!!!!!
• 4 ounces turkey
• horseradish sauce
• grapes
• pickles (sweet)
• light pringles

I am soooo not pregnant I have no idea why I am craving such weird stuff!

FOOD TODAY

• 1 wendys chili
• 1/2 small fries
• a bag tortilla chips
• apple with cinnamon
• banana
• 2 chocolates!!!

Holy heck I have not even had dinner!!! I guess in the back of my mind I am not starting until the 1st so I am not really being strict. My weight has been stable so I guess I am not eating too horrible. HA who in the heck am I kidding??? I have no idea why I am not gaining while eating all of this. I am starting on the 1st though.  I will be back Tuesday with goals. Toodles! 

These thumbprints do not do justice to the art work of one of my new favorites. ANTON PIECK. He was a dutch painter that my son found one of his small pieces of work at a church sale for a buck. I am trying to look him up online.  His work is in a LOT of very old children’s storybooks from the 20’s-40’s.  Sorry for the stupid art history lesson. I guess that is the lame teacher in me. I must be going through teaching with drawl from vacation. hahaha       

Welllllll anywhooooo. I am making my commitment to get back on track today. I weighed in at get ready folks

 194!!!!!!!!!! 

  SON OF A BIT–!!!!!!!!!! 

It is my own doing. Well I am here, no use griping, moaning, complaining, or beating myself up. What good will that do? Make me feel worse and set me up for failure. No thanks!  So here I am thinking about getting back on the wagon. You See over the Christmas week I gave myself permission to be off the path, I jumped off the wagon I did not fall off. I chose this. Now I am choosing to get back on.   I am going to use this weekend to really focus on food and then next Tuesday when my cramps from hello are gone from my TOM I am going to start to focus on working out. I am also going to take a good look at and then post my resolutions for the New Year.

Today is Saturday but it does not feel like one for some reason. Whenever there is a holiday I get my time all screwed up. Plus DH has to pull some extra duty at the airport this weekend. We really can use the money but extra on duty MOM time.  (weak feeble) Hurray!  I love my boys but when does school start again??? They are all hopped up on sugar, fighting with each other, bored with their new stuff ALREADY, and I love my dear boys but getting on my last nerves.   sigh

Well I am off to clean, do some laundry, play with the toddler, and read some more of my new book. Toodles!

 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~6 p.m

What a long strange day. First of all my days are so thrown off it is weird. Second I live in OHIO and the temp. went up to 65* F!!!!!!!!!  I opened up windows to air out the house it was so warm! It is going to plummet in temp. but it felt good for one day to get a taste of what it will be in lets say 3 freaking months!!!!

I cleaned, did laundry, played with my toddler, made lunch, and then read some more of my book and watched a little of Jon and Kate Plus 8. We just had dinner (wonderful DH made it and is doing up the dishes). I am on my TOM and that man is a saint!  I am sooooo tired, crampy, and cranky. Well have to get youngest DS into his bath. Toodles!

• apple with cinnamon sprinkled on it
• banana with 1 TLB. walnuts
• berries (on top of)
• yogurt
• ham
• soy chicken patty
• grapes
• fat free pringles
• low sugar cranberry juice
• 3 turkey tacos
• rice
• ww cake & ww latte

OMgoodness!!!!!!!! I cannot believe how much I ate!!!!!!!!!  JEEZ OH MAN!!! So freaking much for a fresh start!  I am so mad that i ate so much!!! YIKES! This will stop and now!

SIGH

Toodles

First of all I hope that you all had a wonderful Christmas !  I had a great Christmas! In the morning DH and I woke up early to get in a shower before all of our boys came tromping down the stairs to open to ogle and open their gifts. I was able to get a shower and two cups of coffee before they woke up. I was a happy woman!  Later in the morning we went over to BIL and SIL house for brunch and a gift exchange.  The food was good (too good) and the company great. The kids all had a great time and my two year old kept feeding the two lab dogs ham because they would lick his face in thanks and he just broke down in a giggle fit when they did.  LOL  Afterwards we came home and everyone went to their own space to check out new games or new movies or new toys. I sat and started reading a new book that I got while DS (2 yr. old) napped. Before I realized it I ate 6 pieces of Godiva chocolates!!!!!  OMgoodness!  Talk about one heck or a caffeine and sugar buzz!!!    Let me just admit it right here and right now. For every day that I was really good, eating healthy, working out I had another day full of treats here and there. So I DID not by any means stay on track. I gained a few pounds but I am not about to heap on piles of guilt upon myself and make things waaaaay worse. That will just make a cycle. I am shopping tonight for healthy foods, working out again starting Saturday (started TOM today and killer cramps are telling me your not doing anything but laying on the couch)   

 :roll:         

     So I did not do too well. However I can start fresh albeit a few pounds heavier but Thanksgiving and Christmas are behind me and now I can start fresh. No regrets only learned lessons. I will not have to face any hard holiday meals again till Easter so I am happy about that!

Now it is time to think about resolutions. I am actually one of those people who LOVES the challenge of doing this. I see it as fun and it gives me a kick in the pants that I need right now. How about you gals?

Toodles!

Can you believe it? It is the day before Christmas??? I am not sure who is more excited my boys or me!  

I am going to take today and Christmas Day off from my diet. I am not going to go wild but I am going to give myself a little permission to eat a few goodies. Then come the day after I am right back on.  Are any of you taking the day off ?

I have had a headache with the side of my jaw and ear hurting ever since I got the filling. He also had to grind down a crack that I had in the same tooth. I broke it eating popcorn kernels (warning to all of you who have that bad habit like I USED to) I am sick of having a headache since Monday)  Sigh  At least Tylenol helps a tad. I am going to see though if the dentist will prescribe me at least one days worth of pain killer (so I am  not miserable on Christmas)  We shall see. 

ALERT!

ALERT!!!!!!

WARNING!

Food and cheating will be described  below in detail so if it will tempt you do NOT read on!!!!!!!!!

Today is payday so as soon as DH gets home we are dashing off through thr RAIN to church. Then afterwards DH will take all of the boys out to eat while I shop for groceries. Then we go home hopefully the boys will go to sleep right away. YEAH right!  Then the next morning we get up early open a few gifts and get ready to go over BIL & SIL house for brunch and gifts. Then we will take a walk to get some fresh cold air and come home and finish oepning gifts while I roast a chicken stuffed with lemons, thyme, onions, and make a risotto and veggies to go with it. Dessert will be a dutch coco cake with berries and whipped cream. See why I am taking the day off?  I am so bad to be on here talking about cheating and describing the food. Sorry.

If I do not get a chance to come on here again till the day after Christmas I hope and pray that you all have a wonderful Christmas filled with blessings from God. I hope it is full of love, family, and happy memories to be cherished .  God bless!

JOY

Oh  toodles!

It is coming whether we are ready or not. Christmas! I feel sorry for those who still have to do some gift shopping. You would never know the economy is bad by the crowds at the malls. Who knows if people are all buying or are just there for the mall santa, mall walking in this horrid cold weather or just delight in being in mass crowds of people. Not for me thank you very much.  

NEW DIET TV SHOW ALERT!!!!   There will be a new TV show on Lifetime channel starting on  Monday, January 5th, 2009. It will be called  Dietribe. It will be a group of people I think women who are friends and go on this journey together. I am looking forward to seeing it and the new season of The Biggest Loser. They always serve as a big inspiration for me.

I do not have to teach today. I am not sure if I will know what to do with myself.  LOL  I may tackle some long overdue cleaning projects like scrubbing out the fridge or some cupboards in the kitchen.  Maybe I will do some extra flash cardswith my youngest DS. He loves the extra attention. Well it is time for me to get off my tush and do my DVD workout. Talk to all of you chickies later. Toodles!

Good morning all of you sisterchicks! How were your weekends? I hope that they were all great. I had a great day yesterday. We woke up early and all went to church. The choir at church was phenomenal!!!!  You hear them hit perfect notes in “Oh Holy night” and you get those chills down your spine. I love it when music touches me like that!

After church we took the little ones to the dollar store so they could shop with their hard earned money that they have been so carefully working for and saving. The care that they put behind their gifts, taking 1/2 roll of paper and tape to complete their masterpieces is part of the gift itself.  Carefully crayoned Christmas cards on manila paper to be put on the fridge and treasured. Ahhh I love so many aspects of Christmas!

Wow I got off topic.  LOL   Sorry. After we took the kids shopping we took them out to Wnedys for lunch. We like Wendys because it is easy for me to stick to my WW points there. They have a 99 cent menu which with 4 boys is good for the wallet. They always have hot chili which is only 4 points! It is real filling for me as well.

After lunch we went home and relaxed. I was able to sit and read, watch a movie, and then cook dinner (bbq chicken, steamed red potatoes, broccoli, and salad)  After dinner we were able to sit down a read a story to the kids and then go to bed early!! I was tired!

Today I have to go and see the dentist about my filling. My appointment is at 9 a.m. and the drive is about one hour. Told you we live in the middle of no-where.  LOL  After that we have donations to drop off,  1/2 price book store to go to, the library, and Wal Mart. Yikes! So much for thinking of any down time today. At least I know I will be on my points. I can eat with a numb mouth. What is the point of trying till I have feeling?  That reminds me have any of you ever seen the Bill Cosby show on cable when he talks about going to the dentist??  Soooo funny!

Well I have to dash for now. Toodles!

~~~~~~~~~~~ 6 p.m.

Oh my goodness what a long but wonderful day with my boys and DH. First off was my trip to the dentist where i had a filling done. Then we were off to a childrens consignment shop to buy my neice a gift for her baby , she is due with in a month. Then off to the bookstore to buy a Christmas gift. The we dashed off to lunch and then finished our day out at the library. We got home in time for me to make some homemade chicken chow mien with a side or mandarin oranges.  Now I am here, exhausted and ready for bed. YEP its 6 p.m. and I am ready to turn in. Call me old!  LOL

• coffee, coffee, coffee, and more coffee
• 1 Wendys chili
• 1 bag torilla chips
• 4 ounces chicken breast
• 2 cups stir fry veggies
• 1/2 cup rice
• 1 cup grapes
• 1 ww bar
• 1 ww cake

Toodles!

Good morning all of you sisterchicks!

First I need to answer a few questions. Sistah Pat I did the Leslie 4 mile high impact. It was called walking but it was aerobics and running. I loved the fact that I got out of breath and was sore later in the day. For some odd reason I love being sore from a good workout. I am so weird! 

Eileen, no I am soooooo happy to say that my 16 year old DS had school!  God is so good. he would have been a pickle if he had to stay home. You know how 16 year olds are. I thought I had it easy because I had no girls. HA! Boys get hormones as well.       

Today is deep cleaning day. Since it is the last deep cleaning day before Christmas I need to make sure it is cleaner than normal. I have another doantion pile going on that has to be taken to Goodwill. I also have a small pile of books to be taken to Half priced books (great way to make money)

I am so looking forward to going to church this Sunday. My eldest is home and will be going here (new church) for the first time. I think he was surprised that we changed churches (we belonged to our other church for over 12 years).  I miss some of the people from our old church but understood that if we left it is kind of an unspoken thing that we will be shunned and no one will have contact with us from our old church. I guess that sounds a tad Amish when put in print eh?

Well I need to see how all of you sisterchicks are doing. I am sooooooooooooo green with envy over Sistah Pats warm weather!!! I am glad she is going to have the time of her life though. 

Toodles!

 ~~~~~~6p.m.   ish

What a loooong day!  

I am so tired. But it is a good tired. I cleaned the house from top to bottom. Then I wrapped all of DH Christmas gifts. Then I finally caught up on the multitude of loads of laundry my 19 year old DS   brought home for me.  I just finished feeding the boys leftovers (baked spaghetti) while DH and I had a small steak and salad.   LOL My boys would rather have quantity in food rather than quality  (huge plateful of pasta vs. small steak and salad)

Now its time to do family devotions and get the kids ready for bed early. We have church early in the morn and I am looking forward to it!

Toodles

We got rain last night. From 2 a.m. on. The problem with rain in these temps is that when they hit the ground they freeze instantly. DH had to leave 30 minutes early (which meant waking up at 4 :20 a.m.! )   Now I am popping back and forth seeing if the schools in our county will be closed. IT will hit the fan if they are. My 16 year old DS has a school party to attend at school as well as a dance. If school is cancelled it will ALL be cancelled. Lets just say with his issues everyone on the planet will avoid him for fear of his hormonal wrath! 

I did not like the DVD that I tried yesterday. It was a step aerobic one. It did not have good transitions from one move to another. It left me tripping over my own feet. I will try a new one today. I am glad I got these for free from the library.

I can hardly believe that it is less than a week till Christmas! It seems like December just started and here we are with Christmas knocking on the door soon. I am pretty much ready. I have to wrap DH gifts today. He was sooooo wonderful and wrapped all of the kids gifts for me. Was it love or knowing how bad of a wrapper I really am. I mean my 9 year old could do better.   

Well I am off to check the tv school closings again. Then working out. Plus only 1/2 day teaching today! Yahoooooo!

Toodles!

 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 6 p.m.

It is official I am on vacation from teaching and my boys are also all off of school for Christmas. My eldest DS just got home from school (he is 19 and goes to school out of state).  It feels good to have the family all together again. I made some homemade spaghetti and meatballs with Texas toast. I did not make the pasta from scratch like my mother did but it was still okay.  I even had a little myself.

I am so happy to say that I am sore as heck! I did a high impact aerobic tape and then did a set of arms and crunches. I am sore! I LOVE IT!!!!!!!  

Well I am off to spend time with my boys. Toodles!