What are the odds…so you all know that I have beef with medical professionals…they have serious math issues since they think that fat = unhealthy. Again, not saying I’m the healthiest person on earth, but I personally feel that I’m doing a bit better than say a chain smoker or an alcoholic…but that’s just my opinion. I mean, what do I know?

Another thing that annoys me is that they want to blame EVERYTHING on my being overweight. And then try to tell me all slow like because since I can’t control my eating, I must be too stupid to do so. I like the way my friend put it:

So they thought they would have to spell it out for you (ie. dumb it down) so that you would understand how you’re at risk for diabetes, high blood pressure, strokes, cancer, hepatitis, anemia, canker sores and hoof rot, all because you’re not a size 3.

My problem as of late is that they are convinced that I have high blood pressure. Now, contrary to what they may think, I know that I have many of the risk factors of high blood pressure…but I also know that I DO NOT have high blood pressure. They shake their heads in that pitying type way like I’m deluding myself—well, I have been called delusional by a doctor already, so whatever. But every freaking time I go into a medical office, they manage to piss me off BEFORE they take my blood pressure. I don’t know why or how they do that. And then they say that my blood pressure is dangerously high. Well DUH! You’re giving me serious homicidal tendencies; how do you expect my blood pressure to look? So then they look at my weight, and the color of my skin and it all make sense, right?

So I had another doctors appointment because they want to monitor my ‘hyper tension’ since I can’t at home because obviously, I can’t control my eating habits…you know throwing down all of that fried chicken and butter drenched corn bread. I told myself I wasn’t going to engage with these folks…I wasn’t going to argue…I was just going to smile and nod so that I could get out of there in less than the two hours I’m usually in there arguing my point. But that morning, as I put on all black and tied my hair back, I knew I was gearing for a fight and I was just putting on my armor.

I had an early appointment and was called in real quick which helped keep me calm. The nurse who took my weight and blood pressure was very nice to me and managed not to say anything about my weight. So I was still calm when she took my blood pressure thinking happy thoughts and surprise, surprise, a very normal blood pressure. Then I step on the scale and surprise, surprise, I have dropped 12 pounds since my last visit. I know I’m being mad sarcastic right now, but I can’t help it. When ever a doctor sees a fat person, they always assume that person is on their way to being more fat rather than they are trying to lose weight and I argued untill my face was blue the last time I was in there, telling them I had already dropped 50lbs and they wanted to act like they didn’t believe me.

So when the doctor asked if I had been doing anything different, seeing as I was 12 pounds lighter with a normal BP, I said, “Nope, been doing the same, ole, same ole.” Which is completely the truth. The doctor said “That’s great.” Wrote some things on the chart and I was free to go.

I was feeling a little anticlimactic. I was totally expecting an argument; a fight for death; hair pulling and name calling and mama dissing type fight as I argued my point of view. But nothing. It was a nice change of pace, but I felt oddly deflated.