It’s all up to me

Today has been a good start for my first six week program.  The biggest obstacle has been finding time to eat.  I worked out and had a blast because my son came down to exercise with me.  It’s fantastic seeing the smiles on his face when he mimics what I do, I want to teach him that exercise is fun.  While I was on the treadmill he bounced on an exercise ball for at least 10 minutes; if he keeps that up he’ll have killer abs in no time.  Then I ate a good breakfast and headed outside to do some yardwork.  We have been inundated with rain lately and we are some of the lucky ones because our only issues are with mulch being relocated due to all of the water.  What I thought was going to take an hour or so took 6!!  And that was with my hubby’s help.  Granted, we got the whole project done instead of the little part I was planning to accomplish, but it basically involved cutting and lifting wet, heavy sod after we had scooped up the runaway mulch.  I’m guessing we’re both going to be sore tomorrow.

On a different note I’m very frustrated for something that I need to let go.  Our community has been in turmoil lately due to our school district’s financial problems.  Some buildings are being closed, programs relocated and teachers laid off.  Because of this, people are becoming very vocal about their opinions, which I welcome.  But yesterday, a parent took issue with a video that I showed in one of my classes and instead of speaking with me directly about it, she wrote a letter to the editor in our newspaper.  Fortunately she didn’t mention me by name, and I guess it didn’t matter if she did because I can fully justify why I showed that movie, but it just is frustrating that she handled it in this manner.  I have always tried to be a person who takes care of situations directly so I don’t understand why she did not contact me when she learned about this (I showed the movie over a month ago).  I emailed my boss to see if he needed any details and he said that he did not, so I know I should let it go.  But part of my wants to contact this mom and speak to her directly.  I’m sure that would just stir the fire so I’m going to let it go, but I just wish people knew how hard we worked and how much we put up with as teachers.

OK, I’ll get off my soapbox.  Hopefully I will be able to avoid the extreme muscle soreness tomorrow.

I’m ready to go with my reaffirmed focus on a healthy lifestyle.  I made my detailed sheet where I have scripted what I will eat and how Iwill workout tomorrow.  I also added a part where I cross off glasses of water as I drink them.  During the school year I never have a problem drinking water but I don’t drink it as much at home.  This note-keeping may be overkill but it’s just writing down what I think through in my mind every day.  Seeing it in black and white somehow makes it more of an actual plan for me.

I’m excited to be re-starting this journey.  I need to get back to that place where my diet and particularly exercise are at (or at least near) the top of my priority list.  This is the only way that I’m going to accomplish my goals.  I bought another cute dress the other day that should fit very well after about another 20 pounds has fallen from these bones which is achievable during the summer. 

So tonight I’m hopeful that Kyle sleeps well b/c I’m going to get up early to make sure I get my workout in first thing in the morning.  We’re having major rain and have been for quite some time and I’m hoping to get in the backyard tomorrow and shovel/rake some mulch that has floated to a new area in our yard.  That should also burn a few extra calories as well as keep me from eating from boredom.

See you all tomorrow!

I checked the calendar and realized that our family reunion is in 6 weeks.  I was planning to incorporate an interval walk/run program that I took from a Prevention Magazine and it just so happens that it takes 6 weeks to complete.  Perfect timing!!  I’m excited that it worked out that way because it should give me some extra motivation to stick with it and hopefully see some great results.

On a different note, my tv is speaking to me again.  I was on the treadmill this morning and was watching the movie “Why Did I Get Married?”  If you haven’t seen it I highly recommend it.  It’s the story of 4 couples who get together every year and how their relationships have evolved.  Anyway, one character is a very heavy woman who is married to a complete jerk.  He makes fun of her for being fat, makes comments, etc.  Later she’s talking with someone about how she’s to fault for their bad marriage b/c she’s so fat and he said “If you’re unhappy with how you look then do something about it.”  That spoke to me.  I need to get back to that point where the negatives of being fat and lumpy outweigh (sorry for the pun) the positives I get from eating sugary junk food.  I’m not there yet but I can tell I’m getting closer.

On a good note I got in 3.5 miles while I was watching my movie this morning.  I may be imagining things but I think I saw a line down the side of my leg (the one that shows where your thigh muscle is) as I walked by a mirror today.  I have always been athletic so my legs usually bounce back pretty quickly once I start exercising.  Once I start seeing the changes it motivates me to keep going.  Hopefully it won’t take very long.

My hubby and I had to cancel our date today b/c my older son has strep throat.  He had a sore throat yesterday but he would seem sick one minute and absolutely fine the next so I figured he was kind of faking.  Then this morning he did that thing when you hesitate before you swallow b/c you know it’s going to hurt.  So I took him into the doctor and he said before the test even was back that he would be positive for strep.  It was kind of cool b/c he showed me a few signs that I can assess myself the next time he has a sore throat to determine if I need to bring him in to the office.  Anyway, he now has 3 doses of antibiotics in him and is definitely on the mend.

Today I did a weight workout for arms and then did Turbo Jam.  Then, since we ended up not going to the movie I had time to mow the lawn.  I had been hanging out with my son for a couple of hours but reality set in that this afternoon may be the only time in the next week when it’s not raining so it was necessary to take advantage of the break in the weather.  I don’t count mowing the lawn as exercise but it was nice to get outside.

Food-wise I didn’t do too badly but I’m definitely not back on track.  This is definitely going to be the hardest part of my journey.  I think what I’m going to have to do is script everything out the night before.  I’m going to determine what I’ll be eating and exactly what my workouts will be.  I haven’t decided if I’m going to be a total nerd and type the info up and print it off but if I had to guess I would say that I will.  Then I can check everything off as I complete my “task”.  I am such a dork that the idea of crossing something off my list is reward enough.  And even though it’s silly to have to be this regimented, with all the flexibility that summer allows I think it’s the only way that I’ll be able to keep my eating out of control.

I’ll quit talking about how happy I am that it’s summer for those poor saps out there who have to work all year long.  But I do have to say that I feel a real sense of peace right now.  I eventually got up around 7:15, even though I had been up a few times throughout the night (hubby snoring, thunder so ferocious I would have thought we were having an earthquake) but it was nice to wake up and see daylight.  Then I went to tan and came home and did a 3 mile WATP.  On normal days I plan to do 2 workouts every day and either today or tomorrow I’m going to create a schedule, but today we’re taking my older son out for lunch and then going bowling.  I think we’re going to do a lot of bowling this summer if this rain continues :) 

Tomorrow is my hubby’s last day before he starts summer school so we’re going to go to a movie in the afternoon and then catch an early supper before the nurse has to go home.  We’re going to see “The Strangers”, I hear it’s fantastic but it will be weird watching a scary movie at 12:30 in the afternoon. 

Hope everyone has a great day, I need to hop in the shower and get ready for my “date” with my son.  Take care.

Even though I haven’t lost any weight I feel like 1000 pounds have been lifted off my shoulders.  It still doesn’t completely feel like summer, I think b/c the weather has been cool and rainy.  But as soon as it gets warm and sunny I will realize that I’m done for the next 2 1/2 months.  As much as I gripe about my job sometimes but I really do love teaching, especially now that vacation is here.

So I went shopping yesterday and didn’t find anything but did buy a new pair of tennies.  My walking shoes have been needing to be replaced for quite a while so that will help me get off on the right foot.  Sorry, I’m giddy with the idea of vacation so I’m being a bit corny

Then today a friend of mine and I went shopping and I picked up 2 cute dresses.  They’re too dressy for the family reunion but they will be great for school in the fall.  One’s a 16 and the other is an 18, so I’ll have to get my butt in gear.  I can tell, though, that they’re going to look awesome when they fit perfectly.

So for tomorrow, my only priority is to exercise.  My older son is going to daycare for the morning so I’ll have several hours to workout so I won’t have to get up early to do it.  Then my hubby and I are picking him up for a special lunch and taking him bowling.  I think I’m more excited than he is.  It will be fun to spend some special time with him without a ton of stress.

Now that it’s summer I also plan to spend more time reading others’ blogs.  I’m still getting used to having a nurse in our house so I hang out in the basement and we have a computer down there.

We survived another year.  The kids left today at 1:00 and we just have a half day tomorrow.  My friend and I are going out to lunch afterward (yes, fattening Mexican food AND margaritas) and afterward we’re getting pedicures.  Even though I do love my job these are my favorite days of the entire year because we have our whole summer ahead of us and August seems so far away.

<> I’m going to go shopping for my goal outfit after school today but I’m going to be picky.  I’m also going to use the ribbon trick that I read about on someone’s blog, I feel bad that I can’t remember who.  Essentially she cuts a piece of ribbon to go around her waist and then every now and then she measures again and the cuts off what she has lost.  I’m going to measure my goal pants to see what size waist I’m going to need to fit into them.  Hopefully this will be more motivating than weight because the numbers can fluctuate so much but body size tends to be more constant.

I’m still struggling but I just wanted to let people know that I’m still here.  My son has gotten back into his routine of not sleeping so on top of feeling like crap b/c I’m sabotaging myself with food, now I’m just plain tired.  But things WILL get better, I know they will.

Today is the last full day of school, tomorrow they get out 2 hours early.  I’m going to make sure that I get in exercise after school today and tomorrow so that I can slowly get my body accustomed to working out regularly again.  Then starting Thursday I will have the freedom to workout for at least 90 minutes a day.  I’m still debating on the details for Mondays and Wednesdays (because I will have my older son at home on that day) but my general plan is going to be alternating weight lifting activities w/Pilates every other day as well as walking every day.  And instead of a weight goal I’m going to make an activity goal.  I’m also going to take the idea of having a piece of clothing as my goal outfit for the reunion and work to get into those clothes.  Yippee, now I get to go shopping!!!

Thanks for all of the comments on my SOS posting the other day.  Tiny2b’s comments about treading water are an excellent representation about how I’m feeling.  I have finally decided to do the best I can until school is out and then go forward with my plan.  My life is too unpredictable right now and there are too many food temptations for me to realistically say that I’m going to stick with my plan no matter what.  This is just a bump in the road and the bump will end on Thursday.  I know that life will not be smooth sailing over the summer but I will be more in control of my schedule, my food choices and my personal interactions that I will be able to be successful. 

So for today I’m going to cut the grass when my hubby gets home from the grocery store and then my older son and I are going to the pool with a friend of mine and her son.  We’re grilling out tonight with salad so that’s relatively healthy, although it’s more calories than I would normally eat.  Tomorrow-Wednesday, I just don’t know yet.  I’ll have to take those days as they come.