Not prepared for the emotions
I am really struggling today but I am proud to say that I have made healthy choices all day. First of all, we’re home today due to the ice storm and when I’m not busy at school I’m more aware of my hunger. So basically today I have been trying to listen to my body and eat when I’m hungry. The “worst” thing I have eaten today were a bunch of baby carrots. I know they’re healthy but they’re higher in carbs than I usually eat.
The other issue that’s affecting me is that tomorrow is the 1 year-anniversary of my son’s diagnosis. Even though his disease is progressing slowly there is no ignoring the fact that he has a terminal condition and will die, most likely before he reaches his teens. On top of that our 4 year-old has been talking a lot lately about how sad he is that his brother is going to die. We encourage him to share his feelings so I’m glad he’s talking about it but it’s still very tough. Maybe this is why I’m needing such a restrictive eating plan right now. Since so much of my life is out of my control, eating is 1 thing I can control. Geez, what am I paying my therapist for, I can figure this stuff out for myself.
I am so sorry to hear about your son. I lost my first husband to cancer and thru out that time I thought to myself, the only thing worse would be is to loose my child. I am so sorry, life is so short and terribly unfair!