My Journey- Good and Bad!

For the encouragement everyone. Your right, with all thats going on my weight loss shouldnt been my main worry. However, Ive struggled so hard to lose this weight that no matter what is going on in my life, I cant help but worry about my weight as well. I agree I need to put my stress out on the treadmill instead of the fridge. But its easier said that done. Today so far is going smoothly. Its usually at night that I blow it. So lets hope and pray things continue to go well.

Im gonna make it a  better one. I will NOT allow myself to eat a crap load of junk!!! I know I have to be creepin up on the 250s again and I vowed I would NEVER see that number again. I wont allow it. Im too chicken to get on the scale to see the actual number.

I slept 1/2 the morning. They boys and I had a late night. We stayed up til 2 am. Gotta love summer. 

My goal for today on a non weight loss level is to get this house cleaned up. Ive had so much going on that I havent had time to clean as much as I normally do. So as soon as I got up this morning I went to into the bathroom and got started cleaning. I did the sink, mirror, commode, trash, floors. I didnt do the tub. I HATE cleaning the tub. I managed to line out the laundry too. I washed a load, and have  couple more I need to do later. It wasnt really what was dirty that had me irritated. It was the clean clothes. The HEAPING pile of clean clothes. UGH!! I hate that. I like my laundry folded up and put a way. So I spent about an hour in there folding up clothes, towels, etc and putting them all away. The boys are ’suppose’ to be cleaning in thier room, but I doubt they have done a thing. Ill have to go in and help. I still have the rest of the house to line out, but I stopped to have some popcorn.

Guess I better get back at it. Once Im done with the cleaning… I have a treadmill callin my name.

I swear. I am so pissed at myself right now. I dont even WANT to know what the scales say. I can tell Ive gained some more back. My great uncle Danus (Dane) passed away. We burried him Friday. Wed I am having surgery on my right breast to have a lump removed, and then Friday my brother has to have his gall bladder taken out. Im so stressed and I have just let myself eat and eat and eat. It makes me so so so so so so mad!! I KNOW how hard it is to lose this weight, yet I let myself eat and eat and gain and gain!!!

Yesterday was workout 2 of week 6.

Brisk five-minute warmup walk, then:

• Jog 1 mile (or 10 minutes)
• Walk 1/4 mile (or 3 minutes)
• Jog 1 mile (or 10 minutes)

I managed to survive that.

Today (or at least sometime this week) is workout 3 of week 6

Brisk five-minute warmup walk, then jog 2-1/4 miles (or 25 minutes) with no walking.

Im going to attempt it today if the boys will let me. Michael has to work late this afternoon.

I have a raw place on the top of my big toe, where my shoe rubbed it while I was running. Its sore. I dunno if I will be able to stand to run, but Im gonna attempt it.

Ive at least logged into the daily plate every day for a week. Wed I didnt keep up 100% with my calories because that was the day of the fundraiser and I just simply had too much on my mind to fool with putting it in. I did try to keep a general idea of how much I ate in my head. Tuesday of last week I weighed in at 243.8 and today Im 239.0.  Im making an improvement, slowly, but surely. My first goal is to make it back to 236.6 my lowest so far on this journey. Maybe by this time next week.

*TMI ALERT* Ive been having some spotting for the last 4 days. Kinda freaked me out a little. I normally dont spot in between periods. It hasnt been a large amount. Not even enough to get on my panties/pantyliner but its there when I wipe.  I have an appt on the 29th with the Gyno for my yearly check up. Wish me luck. Hopefully Im not pregnant or have anything serious going on. Im totally joking about the pregnancy bit. Id die. I had my tubes tied when Dalton was born.

The fundraiser went well. My pics turned out nice, but only had 6 people show up. UGH! Alot more bought tickets, but just didnt come. Ive spent the last couple days engulfed in Photoshop and house work. Who knew one day with me away from the house and  my men would turn it upside down. lol.

I started back tracking my calories on the daily plate again. My name on there is alanajo if anyone wants to add me as a friend.  The only day I didnt keep up with on there 100% was Wed the day of the fundraiser. I kept up with it in my head though. So far, so good.

Yesterday I did Week 5 Workout 2.

Brisk five-minute warmup walk, then:

• Jog 3/4 mile (or 8 minutes)
• Walk 1/2 mile (or 5 minutes)
• Jog 3/4 mile (or 8 minutes)

I sure didnt think I could run 8 minutes straight, but I did! BOTH TIMES!

Today Im suppose to do workout 3.

Brisk five-minute warmup walk, then jog two miles (or 20 minutes) with no walking.

Im gonna give it a go. I doubt Ill be able to run for 20 minutes but Ill push it as far as I can stand.

I was 242.4 this am.

 Ohh…. I took some pics of this little girl Lauren for a ‘natural’ pageant. It was today. Her Mom just called and let me know she won OVERALL MOST PHOTOGENIC in ALL AGE GROUPS!!! Not just her age group. Best pics in the WHOLE pageant!!! WOO HOO!!!!

A girl finally won!!! YAY!!!!!!

 Today has been pretty good. I came in under my calorie goal. So thats always good. Not too much under, but I didnt go over.

I did workout 1 of week 5 again today since I didnt finish week 5 up last week.

Im so nervous about tomorrow. Wish me luck.

Comes on tonight. Im excited to see how much everyone has lost. I plan to do Week 5 workout 1 while its on.

Tomorrow is the fundraiser. Im doing pics to raise money for my nephews class trip. Im a nervous wreck but I HAVE to keep my nerves down so that I can keep my eating in control.

So far today Ive had

Breakfast:

Quaker Breakfast Cookie. Oatmeal Chocolate Chip.. yeah I know.. I suck.. it was 180 calories!!!  I had a diet dr pepper too.

I did do workout 1 of week 5. But didnt make it any further than that last week. Ive been eating pretty badly. Life has been soooo stressful. My photography business is picking up and the stress is taking over me.

I was 243.8 this am.

Im so sorry I havent been posting. My life has been so hectic the last little bit.  I wont go into all the details but..

My SIL had surgery and is having a hysterectomy soon

My nephew had his tonsils out

My sister was in the hospital for a week.

My BIL was in the hospital for 2 days

Dalton is having issues with pooping again

AND

Bailey has had 4 after school detentions in a 2 week span! He is only in 1st grade!!!!

Stress=Eating=Weight Gain. Gotta keep tellin myself that.

I did all 3 of week 2 c25k workouts last week and walked on the treadmill a couple days too.

I started week 3 of c25k today and I did it. Its getting harder though. Im huffing and puffing but at least Im not passing out. My shins dont seem to be hurting as bad as they were. Yay!!

The scales were NOT friendly today. 244!!  I ate WAY too much this weekened.

 Ive done pretty fair with food today. YAY! Now if I can just keep it up.