I am really struggling right now.  I’m having trouble sticking to my diet, have been lazy this week, not feeling organized or invigorated.  I need to reel it in, get things back under control before they completely fly out of my grasp.  It’s been a little five weeks since I started this blog and I’m down about ten pounds.  But that progress can all be undone in a few weeks if I don’t get my shit back together.  I’m going away this weekend with my family, for a fathers day celebration.  Going to be fun, except I’m preparing an elaborate meal for about fifteen people on Sunday night.  I’m going to take some time, go on a solo hike, relax, refocus.  I don’t even have the energy to get into a food breakdown today, but I need to start doing that EVERY day again, just so that I feel accountable.  I’m frustrated, because I know about a month in is when my resolve starts to waver, and I just need to push on through this hard time by strictly following my loose food plan (lots of vegetables, raw foods, nothing too processed or fatty), planning out my meals each day and doing more cooking.  I’ve been so busy this week that I’ve been eating out all the time and eating things like defrost-and-bake lasagna and other general horribleness.  I love to cook and I know how to prepare healthy food that I enjoy and I also love to exercise and have always been a generally active girl.  Even when I’m not doing strenuous workouts, I’m always walking.  But walking is going to cut it if I’m going to get as fit as I want to be.  I have to get back on my workout schedule as well.  I’m getting fired up.  Tomorrow before I leave for the weekend, I’m going to tidy up the house, go swimming at the college and do a few things that I know will make me feel more centered and re-focused.